Post # 1
I know, I know, you don’t “need” alcohol to have fun. But most of my crowd is 20s/30s, likes to drink and have a good time and I find it loosens people up, especially to dance!
That being said, my venue is about 30 minutes away from my hometown and most of my guests. We’ve booked a block of hotel rooms nearby, and are providing a free shuttle between the venue and hotel (hotel to venue, and then venue back to hotel at the end of the night).
My problem is, this is an expensive area, and the best value we could find is $165 for a night in a standard room.
I’m panicked about this because I know that’s a steep price for a lot of people, including my younger 20-something friends. I’m so scared that because they can’t afford a room, they’ll have to drive home, meaning they’ll leave earlier, won’t drink as much, won’t let loose, etc.
I’m actually so worried I’m almost in tears over it. I just want people to have fun and I don’t know what to do! 🙁
Post # 3
Maybe look into what transportation options are available to go between the venue and the center of the hometown. How spread out is it?
Post # 4
@peachacid: I’ve looked into that but we can’t afford it. Plus, not everybody is from the same town – they’re all scattered across the county but more or less 30 minutes away, just in different directions.
Post # 5
Encourage them to carpool? You’re right, I would never pay 165 to avoid driving half an hour. If a lot of your friends are in “couples” at least half will be able to drink?
Post # 6
Aw, you’re overthinking it! I’ve been to about a dozen weddings in my life and at none of them did I ever use a shuttle or stay at a hotel. (The shuttle is a very nice gesture of you, by the way!) But nor I not any of the other guests were prevented from enjoying ourselves at the bar or on the dancefloor. Sure, people might taper themselves off closer to the end of the night, but that doesn’t mean they will leave early or not dance. If some people do want to take off after the cake – that’s fine. Your closest friends will stick around and dance the night away with you. In their 20s and 30s everyone is an adult and everyone is responsbile enough to figure out rides home, be it having one person be the Dirty Delete and carpooling or perhaps taking a cab (depends on the cost of your town but still possible.) This isn’t a college party so nobody will likely drive drunk, but that doesn’t mean people wouldn’t have fun. As long as there is booze and music, people will figure out how to balance fun and safety. Don’t worry too much about it!
Post # 7
I think it will be fine. I was also worried about people having a good time.. More worried about dancing, not as much about drinking because we only provided limited alcohol (as in wine and beer, and when it ran out, it ran out.. although we actually had some leftover which shocked me and meant that people didn’t drink very much– we only bought enough for each person to have about 2 drinks– but half our crowd didn’t even drink). I was worried because we don’t have a party like group, that people wouldn’t dance and our recepton would end early.. especially when my future sister-in-law who is getting later in the year is basically throwing a frat party for her wedding later in the year. We had no problems whatsoever. Our reception started at 6 and I prayed people wouldn’t leave before 8 and also hoped it ended by 10.
No body left our reception before 8 and the people who left at 8 were the really old relatives, all of who lived in town, but most likely go to bed by 8 or 9. The rest of our crowd was up and dancing (we had about 10 teenagers–cousins and such, 30 people in their 20’s, 10 in the 30’s, 30 between 30 and 60 and 30 over 60). I would say most of the over 60’s left around 8 with the exception of our close family (grandparents). I ended up being the one EXHAUSTED (I didn’t sleep the night before) and went over to my coordinator at 9:15 and told him I wanted to skip the garter and bouquet toss (I was on the fence about this since we only had about 15 single people TOTAL) and wanted to go ahead and start winding the reception down. We did our exit at 9:45. No our wedding was not a big, wild party but even almost 2 months later everyone talks about how much fun our wedding was and I was silly for worrying about people getting up and having fun. Even though only about 30-40 people danced– and probably only 20-25 on the dance floor at one time– those who choose not to enjoyed just talking, catching up and watching others dancing and it was fine.
As for the distance situation, I think it won’t matter. Especially if your friends are 20’s and 30’s. I don’t know very many 20 and 30 year olds who mind driving late at night. Hubby and I are going to a wedding later this summer but have to catch a flight in our town the next day so we have to come home that night. We plan to stay til the end of the reception (probably like 11) and drive the two hours home. Will it limit the alcohol intake for your guests if they drive home? Yes, but doesn’t mean they won’t have fun… It likely will not impact their decision to leave early though.. Now older guests this will impact. But again, alcohol does not equal fun and people can still have a drink or 2 and drive.
Post # 8
@AbeeCee123: can some of your friends share a room? I know a girlfriend of mine ‘went in’ on a room with three other single girls (two double beds) for a wedding recently and they all only had to kick in 30$ so it was definitely worth it to them.
this might seem silly, but i’ve seen lots of bees emphasise to their guests that ‘there’s included breakfast with the hotel and the bride and groom will be there at 9’ or whatever, that extra time with you might encourage them to stay over?
even for couples (if they’re good friends!) they might be willing to crash together if it could keep costs down and allow them to enjoy your night!
also – just because you could only get a room rate of 165 doesn’t mean that’s the absolute best. from time to time check priceline/hotwire/hotels.com and see if something lower pops up. sometimes hotels discount their rooms a few weeks ahead, and if that happens you can let your friends know that there’s a great deal at x hotel for 99 dollars the night of the wedding, if anyone needs a place to crash.
Post # 9
@peonyinlove: (Reply # 7) —> THIS
Great post !! Exactly what I would have said.