(Closed) I'm afraid that SO has no idea

posted 6 years ago in Rings
Post # 3
3471 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA

He’ll learn.  I can promise you my Darling Husband didn’t know how to order a ring, or even the first thing about jewelry when he decided he was going to propose.  He surprised me, so his first step was to call his sister and ask her how it worked… Then he visited a few jewelers to start looking at rings, and asked them more questions.  Finally he learned that telling them he was looking for an e-ring wasn’t the way to go, because when he did that all they showed him was diamond solitares, etc. (which is NOT my style) but he learned a lot about the different kinds of rings/metals/pricing and helped him build a do’s and don’ts list until he found the perfect one.  

Have faith– he’ll figure it out! 🙂

Post # 5
1306 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Hopefully he knows other guys who have bought e-rings and will turn to them for help. If not, he’ll see whats going on after he walks into a jewelry store for the first time.

Post # 6
9955 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

WHY don’t you tell him straight out… that WHEN the time comes to look for a ring that you’d prefer that the two of you do it together ?

You would be surprised how many couples nowadays do this… lots of posts here on WBee

That is what Mr TTR and I did… and I ended up with exactly the type of ring I had hoped for… and he ended up with a ring purchase he was comfortable with… not to mention a Fiancee (me) who is thrilled

Mr TTR is a bit old-fashioned in his thinking… in that he always envisioned that he’d shop without me… but then I would have ended up no doubt with a Solitaire… because that is what Jewellery Stores sell primarily for E-Rings (infact, I’d go so far as to say most Jewellery Stores do prey on men looking for E-Rings and manipulate them into buying something they might not KNOW they ever wanted)

A Solitaire, would have been a BIG disappointment for me, because I clearly didn’t want a Solitaire, because I had one the first time round.

Which infact is HOW the whole E-Ring discussion began for us… I told him that I needed a ring that I LOVED… and I wanted something unique (and something that stirred no memories from my first marriage).  So we agreed to shop together.  And we are very happy that we did…

Because in the end, we did the legwork (and research) together, we KNOW that THE RING we have now is the right one for us. I love the setting… he loves the cost… and we BOTH are 100% sure of the value of it in regards to the 4Cs (5 if you count Certification, 6 if you count Conflict Free / Canadian Dimonds)

Hope this helps,

Oh, and in case you are wondering about Proposals in these situations.  They either come BEFORE the ring is purchased (which is how my own happened)… or the guy puts the ring away, and proposes later on (in his own way / style).  The WAITING BOARD here on WBee is filled with girls saying “I know he has the ring… I’m just waiting for the Proposal”


Post # 7
1093 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

If you know exacly what you want, you could either tell him or confide in a friend. When the subject of rings come up (either by you or him) say “Oh how funny we’re talking about this. Betty and I were talking one day and I told her I know the exact one I want”. That way if he wants to keep you directly out of it he can just go talk to your friend.

Post # 9
3357 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@MissOtter:  my Darling Husband has zero taste in jewelry, and knew that I’m very fussy about such things … so he got me to go ring shopping. I picked out a selection of settings/engagement bands at a few stores and put the selections under his name at the stores so all he had to do was tell them who he was and they would bring out what I had picked out.

All he had to do was pick the diamond, which the jeweler helps with anyway. You could do something like that?

Post # 11
1719 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@MissOtter:  I wouldn’t worry!  I’m sure your SO will have some help from friends/siblibgs/coworkers/etc to shop for a ring.  My Darling Husband had no clue about ring shopping but is now a pro (he knows the 4 Cs and the types of settings!); he has been offering to help his friends ring shop for their gfs. 

I didn’t know the Darling Husband was ring shopping; the proposal was a complete surprise except my sister blabbed that he asked her about rings.

This must be so exciting for you! 

Post # 12
3357 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@MissOtter:  well, he’s your Fiance and he’s a man isn’t he? TRUST him. if you don’t want to flat out pick out your ring, then quit worrying about whether he’ll get it done the right way.

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