(Closed) I'm an awful waiting bee :(

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
2622 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I think I would feel the same way you do. That I was pressuring him, but also angry that he couldnt keep is word (mostly because it would make me feel like he didnt want to do it)

I would sit with him and tell him you are sorry for pressuring him and that you love him. Tell him you want him to want to marry you as much as you want to marry him, and so you do not want him to propose tonight. You want him to propose when he feels ready. 

And then you just live your life and don’t say anything. This way he can feel in control of the situation and you will feel is is proposing because he wants to, not because you want the ring before some pictures.

I would also tell him that you don’t want congratulatory phone calls (or hear about them) or talk wedding plans until you have the ring. Its not fair to your emotions.

Post # 4
Member
597 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

@stace0616:  Honestly, what you did was understandable. I would have done the same! 

If he is THAT disinterested then you need to tell him not to propose until he’s excited to because you thought he was that’s why you were upset and still are. 

And what’s with the push back of the date? 4 months is rediculous, 2 months is fine without stealing anyone’s thunder. 

Best of luck to you, let me know how things work out! 

Post # 5
Member
11747 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

You are going to ruin it for both of you.  You need to tell him not to propose until he is ready and to do it when, where and how HE wants.  You are just going to be disappointed later that the proposal was on your terms not his and feel like he only did it because you pressured him. Just don’t get mad when he does it tonight and you wish he waited and did it in a more special way that was a surprise.

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