- 9 years ago
- Wedding: September 2018
Hi Bees! Well, as I’m sure y’all noticed (maybe you didn’t, who am I to say?) I took a little bit of a hiatus. FH and I have postponed all wedding planning, since our lives are a bit topsy turvy right now.
I did not have a good last semester in school. To make a long story short, I have to take medical leave this semester and may or may not go back to my current school. I plan on working something out with the school that allows me to get my degree from them by transferring credits in (I do NOT want to give up my degree from a Seven Sister, especially after all the time, energy, sweat, tears and money that went into it). However, as of Friday, FH and I will, once again, be in a LDR.
I’m so upset, and he is too (He’s kinda “alpha” in the sense that he doesn’t show emotions, but I know he’s distraught). We’ve gotten into huge fights about it, because I am going back to Texas (we live in Massachusetts) and he doesn’t know what to do. We don’t really know anyone here, and he’s going to be really lonely.
So, he’s thinking about moving back to Milwaukee (where his family is) so that he’s not lonely. I’m super frustrated because he’s got this aunt (by marriage, and they’re the same age) who is infatuated with him (even his mother said this) and he is going to be spending a lot of time with her. She’s probably going to try to do everything I do for M, and that really upsets me. I talked with FH about it, and he said that it was a silly worry, and that he’d tell her he didn’t need any help (he’s a veteran, and has lots of doctor’s appointments), but I just know that once he’s gonna slip up, and she’s gonna be there, and then all of a sudden WHAM she’s taking over what I do.
On top of it all, I’m going to be living with my mom for the semester (yeah, we’ll see how THAT goes) and after that I don’t know. All I know is that I’m going to be away from FH until at least December. It could be next May for all I know. And I’m so scared that we’re going to grow apart, or that we’re not going to need each other anymore. I know it’s irrational, and that lots of people have, and survive, LDR – heck, we’ve already done it once! (he was in the service, and was deployed when we started writing to each other, and then when he got back to the States, he was in Texas while I was in Massachusetts) But we’ve never been apart this long.
I’m just really going to miss him, and I really don’t want to start packing because it just makes it that much more permanent. I’m really scared.
If you read all this, you deserve a hot chocolate or something