(Closed) I’m depressed and start hating our wedding. Wish i could cancel everything :(

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
2703 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

HUGGGGGGGS.

First off, BREATHE, step back and just take a time out for yourself. I totally understand every frustrating feeling about every detail of planning that you’ve done. I hit that point several times throughout our 1.5 year engagement and LOOK AT ME! I SURVIVED and SO WILL YOU!!!!!

I don’t know exactly how it is to plan away from your actual location, but it sounds like that you can minimize the problems that you have listed. JUST TAKE A BREAK AWAY from it all so that you can think with a clear head!!!!! I had to do this many times before I let all of the anxiety and stress of planning overcome my ability to plan a wedding!

As far as the cake, can they deliver it to the hotel that you’ll be using for your reception? And your DIY projects, you still have plenty of time to be able to use them at your wedding!!!! Plus you’ve already found two great vendors! That’s a huge thing you shouldn’t have to worry about!!

And your dress! I’m sure it will be perfect and beautiful!! Many of us have second thoughts, esp when it’s this soon to receiving the dress in person!

What matters most is that you’ll be marrying your Fiance right? I know that wedding planning is not the easiest and sometimes gets harder that anyone can expect, but it’s how you handle all of it that you can control! 🙂 like i said earlier, take a time out from planning for a few days, and come back to it when you’ve cleared your head 🙂 i’m sure it’ll get easier after that!

Post # 4
Member
32 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2011

::Hugs::

I’m so sorry you’re hitting bottom…this wedding planning business is so not what you think it’s going to be sometimes, and it’s such a disappointment.  Have you considered hiring a planner at your destination, or even in your hometown?  They’re great about doing the logistics, and trawling the internet and having the conversations with vendors about where to deliver a cake and hotel minimums and such.  We made some cuts elsewhere in our budget to afford it, and I have to say I haven’t regretted it once because of the peace of mind!  They’re not as expensive as you think.

Post # 5
Member
1251 posts
Bumble bee

How many guests are you having? Are there any bees in the Fort Lauderdale area that might be able to give you some advice?

My friends and I just rented a vacation home for an event, through http://www.vrbo.com, so maybe that would work?

 

Post # 6
Member
1243 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

Okay, breathe.  It’s going to be alright.  

I felt like this right before my wedding and it did go away, but not without some help from the hive and my family.

Would it make you feel better to make a list of all the things that are outstanding?  If you see it on paper (with timelines) perhaps you can come up with a plan to start tackling each issue.  Have you thought about hiring (I know this costs money) a wedding planner in Fort Lauderdale to help you negotiate and look for venues while you’re overseas?  This may really help you out.

Is your FH not helping you?  Can you talk with him to describe the stress that you are under?  Perhaps you can delegate some tasks to him?

If you make a list and decide that the wedding isn’t worth it or just can’t be done, try not to panic.  Call the air lines and see if you can get your money back.  The other idea is to scale back.  What if you and your FH eloped to Fort Lauderdale and then you did a reception back in Germany?

I completely understand how difficult it is to plan by yourself (or feel like you’re planning by yourself), while working within a strict budget, and feeling like nothing is going to get done.  It’s really awful.  Here’s the thing: you’re not alone.  The ladies here can help you.  You just need to figure out if you really want the wedding that you are in the middle of planning OR if you want to change it up.  

Post # 7
Member
28 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2012

So sorry you are having a hard time!  I grew up in Fort Lauderdale.  I don’t currently live there, but if there is anything I could do just let me know- I am pretty familiar with the area.

Post # 10
Member
1251 posts
Bumble bee

I am on winter break, and I have no life, so I have been browsing Yelp Fort Lauderdale. Have you ever heard of 3030 Ocean Restaurant? It’s really highly rated on Yelp and they have private dining rooms for 8 people – 30 people. And it’s on the beach. 

http://www.yelp.com/biz/3030-ocean-fort-lauderdale

Another beachfront place, Casablanca Cafe, has private rooms as well. 

http://www.yelp.com/biz/casablanca-cafe-fort-lauderdale

Post # 11
Member
28 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2012

ILikePink’s suggestions seem like really good ones for restaurants.  I will do some more searching around to see what I can come up with.  The actual Fort Lauderdale beach is a pretty happening area, and I know you can have ceremonies there but you cannot restrict others’ access (so it would be hard to control people in the pictures).  I also know you can rent shaded chairs and other types of simple beach furniture there, but it might not be exactly what you are imagining for hanging around on the beach afterwards.  

The good thing about that area, is there is just continuous beach!  So Ft. Lauderdale beach proper is really busy, but a little south is Hollywood Beach (and north is Lauderdale by the Sea which is smaller) which absolutely has some more private beach areas (though then of course not all the nice dining options).  If you wanted a simple beach ceremony and a quiet place to hang out afterwards- maybe that makes sense?  And then actually stay and do the nice dinner in Fort Lauderdale proper?  

Post # 12
Member
28 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Also there is Dania Beach.  As far as furniture, I don’t know how much I see furniture set up, but some of the nicer hotels have pools right on the other side of the boardwalk and you can have gazebos and stuff there.  This place is my favorite but is uber fancy/pricey, but I’m including a link so you can see how they have their pool/gazebo area really close to the beach: http://www.diplomatresort.com/poolbeach

I imagine there are other similar set-ups.  Even if you don’t have a hotel arrange for the wedding (because they have minimums and all) and do that on your own, you could still take advantage of their pool-side cabanas right near the beach!

Post # 14
Member
28 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I agree the 3030ocean looks really nice.  Have you talked at all to the Marriott about what exactly you are looking for?  I know they have a minimum, but to me it seems like what you are envisioning is a little different from what they have in their wedding package.  You really just want a ceremony on the beach, a beautiful place to hang out/not sit on towels, and then a nice dinner right?  I don’t see why they can’t make that happen…same goes for any place you really like in that area.  They might have a min for renting out their ballroom and catering and all that, but simply arranging an oceanfront ceremony and then treating a small group like VIP guests?  They should do that!!

 

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