- 4 years ago
- Wedding: October 2015
This is long but I’ll try to keep it as short as possible. I apologize in advance for the NSFW language, I’m just so frustrated. I’m a 28 year old woman (turning 29 in October). I am hard of hearing in one ear and deaf in the other (this will be important later). I have a BA in English from a well-respected state school though I graduated in 2011 with a 2.72 GPA. My senior year of college was fraught with a lot of family issues and it really affected my final GPA badly. I’ve looked into applying to grad schools but they want a minimum of 2.75 GPA to even get in. Unless I try to apply for probationary status or whatever but then I wouldn’t be eligible for financial aid.
Even if I got into grad school, I have no idea what career I would go for or what to study. I’m not willing to take on more school loans unless I’m able to actually get a usable degree out of it. When I graduated, I wanted to go into writing, publishing or journalism. But even after landing two unpaid internships, I couldn’t make anything happen.
So I went into retail. Did that for a while. Then managed to get hired as a marketing specialist for a small real estate company. But I don’t think I was very good at my job because my boss wanted me to do a lot of graphic design stuff like setting up his website and stuff like that and also just market his company in general which I never really learned how to do. I tried to teach myself but wasn’t learning fast enough, I guess. After about a year, I got laid off. Though I suspect it wasn’t really a lay off but a firing for me being incompetent. But he framed it as a laid off due to budget cuts. I don’t know.
Since then, I’ve mainly done retail (cashier at a grocery store). Then one day, I answered an ad for an assistant teacher at a daycare/preschool. To my surprise, I got hired. I worked there for about 6 months but left due to the long commute.
I got hired right after that as an assistant pre-k teacher for 4-5 year olds. I started that job in January 2015. Really liked it even though the pay was barely above minimum wage and the organization followed the local county school calendar, which meant I was paid hourly and didn’t get paid during summer and Christmas breaks. But I liked it a lot because of the lead teacher, we got along great.
Then after the summer, I got assigned to a different teacher. This was last year. And I have never hated my job more. Or hated a person more. The lead teacher was absolutely horrible to me and incredibly cruel at times. I went home in tears many times. I think a lot of it was because I had trouble hearing her and we were both extremely frustrated with the situation. Though I never took it out on her like she did me. One morning driving to work, I thought about seriously committing a minor car accident but serious enough to land me in the hospital. That’s how bad it was. I wanted to hurt myself to avoid working with her.
Anyway, the year ended. I did tell my boss, the center director, that I wanted to be transferred by the next school year and that we were having bad communication problems and we didn’t work together well at all. She said okay. Then she quit last month.
And now the school year is about to start and I have no idea who I’m gonna be paired with. I am terrified I’ll be assigned to the same teacher from last year.
I’ve been applying to jobs this summer but I’m not getting interviews for anything other than teaching jobs. And I just want to leave child care in general. I don’t like the uncertainty of not getting along with another teacher. I hate getting sick all the goddamn time. And I want to make money. I have a goddamn BA in English and I’m almost 30 and I don’t even make $9 an hour. And I don’t even get paid during the summer and Christmas break.
My husband and I want to buy a house but we can’t until I start making more money. I tried writing freelance stuff from home this summer. Just little short stories. I did make a little money but it’s not enough to quit my day job, nowhere near enough.
I’ve been applying to a bunch of office jobs. Administrative assistants, office assistants, anything entry-level really. But no one will even call me. The only time I get interviews is if I apply to other pre-k teaching jobs or part-time retail jobs.
I need help. I’m so fucking depressed about all this, it makes me want to cry. I’m happily married, we have a cute little apartment but career-wise, my life sucks.
Please, does anyone have any advice on what to do next? Any jobs that you could think could work for a hard of hearing person and make some decent money? For me, decent money is like 25k and up.
And if you read all this, thank you. I didn’t mean to write a novel but I felt that if I painted a complete picture, people could give better advice.