(Closed) I’m going to be the large bridesmaid… Vent

posted 8 years ago in Full Figured
Post # 3
2538 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

You were picked because you’re loved and important. Remember that. As far as the pictures, I haven’t even looked at all mine, but the memories of the time with my posse was amazing and only serves to make me love them more.

Post # 4
543 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Realize that you are in this wedding because people love you. When they see you they don’t see someone who is tall or large or what-have-you. They see Jen4414, a fantastic friend and someone who they’re proud to have stand with them.

Post # 7
5977 posts
Bee Keeper

I totally agree with the other posters. The bride didn’t choose her bridesmaids b/c of their size. She chose them b/c of how important it is to her that you’re standing up there with her and supporting her. Just try to keep that in mind!!

Post # 8
299 posts
Helper bee

As someone who has always been the big bridesmaid, at every wedding I’ve been to…

I know how you feel, but keep in mind that NO ONE pays attention to the bridesmaids. Seriously, no one cares how they look except for the bride, and she obviously wants you just how you are.  People will look at you for maybe 3 seconds, and then the bride will show up and everyone will stare at her.  It’s not a beauty pageant; you’re in a supporting roll, so have a drink, crack some jokes, stop worrying and have a good time.

Post # 9
2192 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Honey, I can relate! I’m in a wedding in October and I am the ONLY plus sized bride out of all 5 of us. I get you! But, what I had to tell myself was exactly what the PP’s have said and that is that I was chosen for a reason and that I’m loved and that’s all that matters! I plan on rocking myself a bridesmaid dress lol

Post # 10
1398 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I am having three bridesmaids-who are in order,  a size 32W-5’0, 14-5’5 and an 8- 5’11. I asked these three woman because they are the woman I respect and love most in the world, and the ones I want to stand beside me on the most important day of my life. I don’t care if they are fat or thin or tall or short, I just care that they are there. The bride in the wedding you are standing up for probably feels the same way. She knew what you looked like when she asked you, and obviously it did not matter to her then, and won’t matter to her on the wedding day either. Don’t beat yourself up, own your big beautiful self, and stand by your bride with confidence that you are there because she loves you and she wants you to be there.

Post # 11
4755 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

don’t wear the shawl first of all is screams your insecurities and second it would accentuate whatever it is you’re covering up.

attempt to feel great in the dress (hopefully she’s allowed you to have a figure flattering dress) after that I doubt you’ll be noticed (in a good way!)

Post # 12
6830 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Hey you got it flaunt it! More to love of you. Smile That is how I think of it, and I be a plus size woman and will be the bride and biggest in my wedding party. You will rock it!!!

Post # 13
785 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

They’re not going to look at pictures and say, “Oh look, there’s the big tall girl next to all the super models.”  They’re going to say, “Oh, there’s Jen4414, one of my best friends.”  Remember that you are here to support one of your dear friends–everyone’s eyes will be on the bride, not you.

Also, I’m sure that the other girls aren’t perfect either.  My girls are all completely different sizes.  One is plus-sized but petite, two are little and petite, and one is almost 6′ tall.  They all have their physical flaws but to me they are just my beloved friends–and to me they are beautiful 🙂

Maybe you could convince the other girls to wear reeaaally tall heels, and you wear flats.  That might eliminate a bit of the height disparity 🙂

Post # 14
131 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Believe me I get you! I just went through the same thing in my brother’s wedding. There were three other bridesmaids size 0, 4, 6. I was sooo much bigger. I literally cried about it. I was so thrilled for my brother and am very close to his now wife but had such a hard time with it. I was very close to dropping out and felt bad about it because I didn’t want to make it about me but wasn’t sure if I could walk down the aisle as a whale. Well I spoke to my brother and he said she would be upset if I dropped out, so I sucked it up and remained in it. I know I would’ve been pissed at myself if I ended up watching it from the sidelines, as I’m sure you would end up feeling as well.

What all the girls said is true, she picked you for a reason. Be grateful that she did and stand by her despite what insecurities you have.

Oh and I did end up wearing a little jacket thing from David’s bridal. My now SIL gave it to me cuz she knew how I felt about my arms. Do what makes you comfortable!

Post # 15
1003 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

You are going to be awesome! I know lots of tall girls who were bms and they looked great!

Post # 16
1636 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I have a friend who is 6’1.  And if i was really getting married I may consider her as a bridesmaid:)  don’t worry about it.  I agree with the poster who said that “oh look there is Jenn and I am so glad she was part of my special day” 

Also if you are worried about the pictures…  photographers are awesome!

My friend Stacy just got married, an elopement ceremony, but a few of us girls were there, and I aint gonna lie, i was the most plus siziest.  Somehow the pictures worked:) it was great!

Do not worry about it.  you were picked because you are special!  I hate to tell you this, but you are special and you were chosen so you may just have to live with it, and move on:) LOL 🙂  seirously!  but I can totally relate!


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