(Closed) I'm going to end the relationship. (Cross necklace spinoff).

posted 6 years ago in Secular
Post # 92
Member
984 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Good for you, OP! I don’t think you’re being selfish. I do think many posts here are downright nasty and uncalled for…not exactly “Christian” I daresay. Interesting.

Post # 93
Member
1262 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

@Fizzy8:  Her comment could have been a source of explaining the atheist perspective in a respectful way. Instead it was just straight-up bashing.  She could have very easily said, “Atheists simply cannot believe in God, so when others believe in him, we do not view it as faith in a “higher power,” but rather a faith in something that isn’t there, and thus not something that is a positive trait. We generally view it as something socially constructed and politically charged, so we have an inherent problem with those who believe in Christianity.” That conveys the exact idea she did, without being blatantly insulting those who have religion. Hers was instead framed as an attack, and was not put in the context of the issue at hand but instead just said like a solo statement about religion, and hence, my calling it out of place. Which it was.

 

Most people, I would say, have agreed that the difficulty of the two different beliefs, if she can’t reconcile it, is understandable. Slightly fewer people have thought her wanting to break up with him was unfair, based on his basically being willing to not act like a Christian around her. For those people, a statement like the one I rephrased above would be helpful to give the mindset the OP has.  But the way it was initially stated was not informational, but actually aggressive in tone.

 

Post # 94
Member
4047 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

Crayfish is trying to shed light – I think most of us atheists on this thread feel like the believers here are not understanding where the OP is coming from – that those of us who are strict atheists cannot reconcile with beliefs that we find to be absurd. Many of us consider modern Christianity in the same way that you may think of ancient mythology – to us the Christian god is no different than Zeus.

And that is why many of us atheist could never be married to a Christian – some can, some can’t. The OP seems to be in the can’t camp. 

Post # 95
Member
1521 posts
Bumble bee

@arabbel:  +1000 

@bowsergirl:  I respect everyone’s belief and entitlement to its construct in their lives but belittling another’s belief is definitely wrong and comes across as snarky with ill intentions. 

When times of turmoil come many ppl turn to their face, I think many pp’s r showing empathy towards him because he was pouring his heart out in the only way he knew how and its being met with a break up which is going to hurt him really bad. But the OP realizes that the situation solidified her haunting inner feelings on the inevitable, she cannot accept him bcz his faith is so strong, which she is doing the right thing in this case it’s just a sad scenario 

 

Post # 96
Member
51 posts
Worker bee

I love how this whole thread is bashing on her for being evil to stay true to her non-beliefs. If it were flipped the other way around, where she WAS Christian, and her partner gave her ANOTHER conflicting religion’s token, everyone would be here on her side.

OP, if you ever need athiesm support, check out reddit.com/r/atheism

I’m sick of people acting as if atheists’ beliefs also shouldn’t be respected and honored. 

Post # 97
Member
51 posts
Worker bee

@Fluffmallow:  I do think many posts here are downright nasty and uncalled for…not exactly “Christian” I daresay. Interesting.

 

Half the reason I realized the religion was bogus. 😉

 

Post # 98
Member
69 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

@crayfish:  well maybe some people need fairy tales. 🙂

 

And I don’t think it’s ok to bash anyones religion. I understand it sounds weird to some people, but to others it’s just like history. Things happen all the time that can’t be explained by science and you can enterprite them how you want, as will I. I find atheists to be pretty annoying most of the time to be honest. They are the religion I most often see as bashing all others, and calling them stupid. Well I may not be able to prove there is a God out there. But prove to me there isn’t.

 

Post # 99
Member
97 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

If you would have just realized you weren’t compatible, that’s fine you know, whatever. You post on here that you gave back his religious gift then gave him a book on your own beliefs. And now that you know you can’t change his mind, you don’t wanna be with him. I sense a disturbance in the force, somethins not right about all that. He’s probably better off without someone like you who will always try to cripple and undermine his faith.

Post # 100
Member
69 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

@mrspinesol:  Thank you! and you said what I was thinking before I even thought it haha.

 

Post # 101
Member
4369 posts
Honey bee

@kmc110:  I’m not bashing anyone’s belief, but how do you prove something is not there? I mean, I think none of us believe in unicorns, but how can you PROVE unicorns don’t exist?

Post # 102
Member
4047 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

@SoupyCat:  +1. Exactly why that is such a crappy argument.

Post # 104
Member
69 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

@SoupyCat:  I understand. And I don’t care that she doesn’t believe in God. But to say others are idiots for believing is wrong in my opinion. But to answer your question. You can’t prove gravity is or is not there either. It’s a theory, like many others. And I’m not the type of christian who believes the big bang is ridiculous. I’m a logical person. I just think someone had to set everything in motion. I don’t think that’s such a stupid thing. I mean why can’t science and religion go together? and no not in the way of scientology lol. no offense if you believe in that.

Post # 105
Member
1880 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@SoupyCat:  My husband used to date a girl who believed in unicorns, apparently. At first he thought she just really liked them, but slowly found out that noooo she actually thought they were real. Sigh. His friends like to tell all the stories about her a lot because they are hilarious. Admittedly… the stories are hilarious. Because she believed in unicorns.

Post # 106
Member
1262 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

@banana_nut13:  Actually, I can virtually guarantee that if she were a Christian, stated how she had a loving, sweet Buddhist Fiance who never pressured her to be a Buddhist, gave her a gorgeous, expensive necklace with a kanon on it, expressely stating she need not wear it, and it was just for his peace of mind, and then she decided to give it back because that was too much of his religion for her (and consider asking for a cross necklace instead in the process!) and hand him a Bible instead, and then on top of all of that decide to break up with him after all, she would be getting as much if not more flack than OP.

I don’t think people are in arms so much because she doesn’t like Christianity, but because she is stating that she is uncomfortable at the thought of someone trying to convert her or even secretly wanting her to convert, all the while seeing no problem with doing the exact same thing she doesn’t want done to her.

I mean, while I totally agree with her that they should split and can 100% understand why an atheist could not reconcile being with a Christian, and think this is ultimately the healthiest decision for her sanity down the road, I do think the way she went about all of it was fairly hypocritical. 

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