(Closed) I’m Methodist and he’s Catholic what do I do?!?

posted 7 years ago in Christian
Post # 3
Member
6572 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2010

What about a more neutral place, not in a church? Or are you set on a church?

Post # 4
Member
3176 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Do you belong to your church? FH is baptist and we are having a Catholic ceremony. It seems like a lot of red tape at first but if you talk to the priest at his church its not that bad. You do have to follow Catholic rules though.

Post # 5
Member
467 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

im by no means an expert, and im sure it varies from parish to parish, but im pretty sure you can get married in a catholic church as long as either the bride or groom is catholic.

however, there are sections of the catholic marriage ceremony that refer to raising your children as catholic, and you would have to go through pre-cana and other catholic preparation for the ceremony

if your Fiance is a member of a church, have him speak with the priest and see what that parish’s stance is on it.

for what its worth, there were several couples in my pre-cana class that were not both catholics, and there didnt seem to be a problem with it

Post # 7
Member
389 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

@UpstateNYPrincessBride: Honestly, non Catholics marry Catholics all the time, its completely normal. There are rules but simply not being Catholic does not mean you can’t get married in the church. My best friend is Jewish (not really practicing) and SHE’S getting married in a Catholic church. It can be done!

Here is a link to a site that has TONS of info on Catholic Weddings. http://catholicweddinghelp.com/

Post # 8
Member
1556 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

You can be married in either church.  It’s up to you and your Fiance which you prefer. You can even marry in the Methodist church and still have your marriage seen as valid by the Catholic Church if you get a dispensation (your FI’s priest can arrange this for you).
 

To be married in the Catholic Church, only one of you must be Catholic.  You do not have to be.  You also cannot have been married previously, unless that marriage was ended by death or you have obtained an annulment.  Finally, you will have to do the marriage preparation required by the Catholic Church.  The Catholic spouse will be required to promise to raise any children as Catholic.  You are not required to make that promise.

Have your Fiance talk to the priest.. Better yet, make an appointment for both of you to meet with him.  I think you will be pleasantly surprised.

Post # 9
Member
2600 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Have Fiance or go with Fiance to talk to the priest and see what he says first.

I’m not sure where you are in Upstate, but I used to work with a man that was a priest and performed catholic style masses (though not recognized by the church since he was no longer himself) for my brides that did outdoor ceremonies.  It was a great option for mixed religion couples who just didn’t love the vibe of the church.

Post # 10
Member
411 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Seriously, it’s fine.  I’m Methodist and my husband is Catholic.  He wanted his priest from college to perform our ceremony, and the priest had zero issue with it.  All you need is your baptismal record.  Even if your not baptized, it should be fine.  Our priest even offered multiple times to have me ask someone from my Methodist background to co-lead if it made me feel better.  It’s super easy, you just may not be able to do a full Cathoilc mass for your ceremony.

Post # 13
Member
2600 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

@UpstateNYPrincessBride:  I used to be a wedding planner in Bolton Landing, so I know he serves the Lake George area… if you find he may work for you let me know and I’ll dig up his info.

Good luck!

Post # 14
Member
1231 posts
Bumble bee

My parents got married in a catholic church in albany. My dad is catholic my mom isn’t. There was no issue, they just couldn’t have a mass (which on a hot day in august no one was too upset not having to sit in there for long!) Ask the priest of the church your looking at and go from there, but i’m sure it won’t be a problem. 🙂

Post # 15
Member
1025 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

@thewheelsonthebus: 

You can definitely get married in the Catholic church. There are basically 3 types of Catholic weddings:

a) Catholic + Catholic: If both parties are Catholic, it is a sacramental marriage and usually is a full mass (ie with communion). When both parties are Catholic, they are encouraged to have received the sacrament of confirmation first, though it’s not necessary. So that’s how the confirmation rumor starts. 

b) Catholic + Baptized Christian: This also a sacramental and valid marriage. There is not usually a mass, and instead is the readings + vows, but no communion.

c) Catholic + Non-Christian (or a Christian who has been baptized): This is a valid marriage but not sacramental. If someone is a Christian and wants to get baptized before marriage, they don’t have to have a Catholic baptism for it to be recognized by the Church. There is not a full mass.

Hope that helps!

Post # 16
Member
133 posts
Blushing bee

Everyone here gave good advice, but because it was mentioned, I want to comment that you do not need to be confirmed to be married in the Catholic Church.  Also, Catholic rules do not vary from parish to parish (when it comes to things like who can get married).  You can Google “Catholic Canon Law” and get the universal rules that apply to all parishes.  Whether you can use rice at the wedding is a parish by parish decision.

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