I hope you don’t answer the door when she finally decides to come deliver the dress. Normally, I think ghosting is rude and immature. For you, I think it is appropriate.
Yes, you need to learn how to say no, stand by your decisions and not cave in. But this is waaaaaaay past ridiculous.
A Maid/Matron of Honor should be someone who is involved in the bride’s life prior to being engaged. AKA THE BRIDE SHOULD ALREADY HAVE YOUR CONTACT INFORMATION AND HAVE SEEN YOU IN THE PAST FEW YEARS….to say the freakin’ least.
This bride sounds like someone who just cares about appearances. Which are not based in much or ANY truth at all.
Having a Maid/Matron of Honor who was a friend to the bride since elementary school? How sweet and touching! Having many bridesmaids in the bridal party? Wow, the bride has so many friends and supportive people in her life that she loves? Expensive bridesmaid dresses? Wow, the bridesmaids and the bride have excellent taste, must have a lot of money and be very successful in life!
She wants a picture perfect, bridal editorial wedding feature, and won’t stand for less.
Manipulation through crying, whining, pounding the table, harassment through texts, phone calls is not healthy.
This is not someone who you have had a relationship with in many, many years. You are being used. And I would agree with many PPs to say: Yes you have to grin and bear it, you should have stood up for yourself and stood your ground, but I get it. This is a really freaking weird situation. Past weird. Unhealthy and stressful.
You are pregnant, so you cannot be dealing with added and unecessary stress in your life. I agree with another PP, you think you are going to give birth by X time, but what if you are late past your due date? What if (and I do not wish this on you, hope your birth of your child is healthy and easy as possible) there is an issue which requires you and/or your baby to be hospitalized longer?
I would ignore her delivering your dress. You never asked for her to purchase a dress, a $900 freaking dollar dress, for you. I would send her an email or text explaining that you can no longer be in her wedding due to needing to put your family, and child, first. Then block her.
Or just block her. Ignore calls from numbers you don’t know for awhile also.