(Closed) I'm MOH and I want out…

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 46
Member
7229 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2016

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jackiebee :  I was thinking the exact same thing!

Post # 47
Member
54 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

 I wonder if you told her that the doctor made a mistake on your due date and the baby is due the week of the wedding and you might be wearing a 9 month Prego dress and your water could break at the wedding so she needs to be prepared for the fact that you might disrupt her wedding. Start turning the attention tables on her and she may decide that having you in her wedding is too much attention not focused on her. If you start making some demands that seem over the top…You need to have a chair in case you can’t stand for the whole ceremony, etc… 

Post # 48
Member
2175 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Unless you are Amal Clooney or the like and she feels she’ll get some cache for having you stand up as her Maid/Matron of Honor, I do not understand this.

But seems to me all you have to do is show up for an hour and you get a free $900 dress, so at this point I’d suck it up.  Tell her you don’t feel comfortable leaving your baby so you’re going to carry him or her up the aisle with you.  If she doesn’t like that she can let you bow out.  But it sounds like she’s so desperate to have you that you could practically make out with the groom and not get out of this wedding so I wouldn’t count on it.

Post # 49
Member
957 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: City, State

Sometimes with people like her, it’s better to just say no and offer no reason, because they will keep on arguing.

Say no, and don’t accept the dress. Send the dress back via UPS if it’s easier for you. Don’t engage in conversations with her anymore.

Post # 50
Member
2599 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

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jackiebee :  Yes!!! Except that other chick really wanted to be in it too. 

Post # 51
Member
408 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

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fluffthoughts :  can you lie and say you have pregnancy complications and need a c-section and will be on bed rest? 

Post # 52
Member
3853 posts
Honey bee

I’m pregnant and due a month before the wedding

I just have to say that you sound as crazy as this faux-friend. Do you think you are going to want to/should be committing to ANYTHING other than taking care of your newborn?!! Is this your first baby or something? Do you not know what it’s like the first weeks/months after giving birth??

ETA: I agree with a pp – refuse the dress, back out, block all calls/social media. You don’t even really know this person…why do you care? She certainly doesn’t care about you.

Post # 54
Member
54 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

OK the fact that she is stalking your house and blatantly lied is kind of unnerving…Is there even actually a wedding in the works? She sounds like she needs mental health evaluations. I would block her texts. And be prepared to get a no stalking order against her. 

Post # 55
Member
457 posts
Helper bee

Gosh what a drama. You’ve done the right thing. I don’t think you should engage with her for now. You aren’t going to convince her to see things your way. 

Post # 56
Member
457 posts
Helper bee

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fluffthoughts :  I realize it’s not funny at the moment, but she sounds so frickin crazy that I’m sure later you’ll see the humor in it. Lol she sounds off her rocker and I’m glad you put your foot down. Don’t answer her and let her go on with her life. She’ll never respect your wishes so don’t even try. 

Post # 57
Member
2527 posts
Sugar bee

She was just standing there outside your door? And there IS NO DRESS??

That chick is throwed off in the head. Block her number and go on with your life.

Post # 58
Member
2002 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2014 - Italian Villa

Omg. Move. 

This is upper-level psycho. I agree with PP that there probably isn’t a wedding  (or other bridesmaids).

Girl, keep your wits about you. I don’t want to see a new Dateline and wonder if it’s about you. 

Post # 59
Member
1992 posts
Buzzing bee

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fluffthoughts :  The only strategy this sloppy bitch has to get what she wants is to throw a tantrum like a toddler–complete with screaming, tears and trying to make herself puke. You better get ready in case her next move is to flail her little fists at you in any way she can. 

Ignore the text and when she hits you with another one (and she will, and it will probably be a novel about how horrible you are) tell her you are not interested in a friendship and that you are formally asking her to stop contacting you. Collect all the bizarre messages and write up an account of what happened when she showed up uninvited at your door, because your next step is to start a paper trail with the police. 

Post # 60
Member
1295 posts
Bumble bee

Did you ask her why she needs you so bad?  And why, if she has other bridesmaids, they can’t just step up since they’re already planning everything?  I’m just curious.

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