Post # 1
Last summer my Fiance and I visited my family on my dad’s side in another state and that was my FI’s first time meeting them. I have a little cousin who is about 7 and when we told my uncle that our wedding will probably be next summer he said he would try really hard to make it so my Fiance and I told him that if he can then we’d love for his daughter, my cousin, to be our flower girl. We haven’t heard if he was gonna be able to come or not for a few months and during that time we heard about this really cool alternative to having a flower girl and ring bearer in a way to honor our grandparents. We got really excited about that idea but my uncle just told me he is going to be able to make it to the wedding. And of course I’m super happy that they can come but at the same time we haven’t really talked to him about his daughter being a flower girl. I’m not even sure if he told his daughter yet. My problem is that we really want to do this cool idea for our grandparents instead of having a flower girl and ring bearer but idk if my uncle might get hurt that we aren’t including his daughter anymore. Is there a way to tell him that we aren’t going to have a flower girl anymore or a way to incorporate his daughter into the wedding as something other than a flower girl? If it doesn’t seem like there’s a way around this then we are still okay with having her as a flower girl, it won’t be like the end of the world or anything haha. But just looking for some opinions!
Post # 2
So I am guessing there’s no way to somehow include both? What is the grandparent idea?
Post # 3
Just ask him if he’s already brought it up to her and go from there. Explain the grandparents idea. Maybe she heard about it and doesn’t even want to do it. If she’s really excited then maybe you can incorporate both her and your grandparents? I would just talk to him about it. But remember it’s your wedding so if you’re really set on a certain idea just talk to them and I’m sure it will be fine. Good luck!
I am super curious to hear what the grandparents idea is!!
Post # 4
She can do something else. I’m sure your uncle will understand you wanting to do something else, his daughter being a flowergirl was not set in stone
Post # 5
I can’t imagine he hasn’t told her, especially since he’s now certain of attending. You seriously want to kick a 7 year old out of the wedding? That’s lower than low.
If you do, YOU need to be the one to tell her, and not via email, either. Phone call at minimum, in person would be best. Don’t blame it on your grandparents idea (whatever that is, why can’t you do it in addition to a flower girl??). Blame it on you changing your mind.
Post # 6
I don’t understand why you can’t have both the grandparents and the little girl walk down the aisle?
Post # 7
I think I know what you’re talking about regarding the grandparents being flower girls/ring bearers. I’ve seen it a few times in the last year.
Could the grandmas and your cousin walk together as flower girls? I feel like that would be incredibly adorable.
Post # 8
You already asked her to be a flower girl. You can’t unask.
And as some PP have asked, why can’t you have both?
Post # 9
I agree, you have already asked her so you can’t unask. Just do both.
Post # 10
i’m just commenting following this out of sheer curiosity as to what the really cool grandparent idea is.
Post # 11
Telling us what the grandparent idea is would give everyone a better idea of how you could get around it. Surely you could do both?
Post # 12
It’s really not a good idea to change your mind now. Hopefully you can do both.