- 9 years ago
- Wedding: October 2010
on my marriage already. And the reason?? His family. I’m sorry this is going to be long, I just so badly need help and to vent.
Darling Husband & I had dinner last night w/ a very close family friend. These people are like a second set of parents to me and have helped Darling Husband & I w/ past relationship issues. I ended up spiling to him (it was just the husband) how hard of a time I’m having w/ Mother-In-Law and 1 SIL. Issues that have stemmed from our wedding, but also issues that I’ve had for over 7 years. Darling Husband ends up telling us a lot of hurtful things his mother has said, things that he’s never told me.
I’ve been unemployed since June. I started looking for work but w/ the wedding I ended up putting looking for work on the back burner. I’m starting to get back into the groove of things. Darling Husband tells me that his mother is always asking about my employment status and saying rude things about it. She still owes us money for things she was to pay for for the wedding (things she OFFERED to pay for, we never asked), but when Darling Husband asks her for the money she’ll tell him, “Why don’t you tell that b***h to pay for it. Oh, that’s right…she doesn’t work. She can’t do anything for you because she refuses to work”.
I am SO damn angry. This was the final nail in the coffin. She has NO room to talk about our finances. She has NEVER done a damn thing for us. My parents payed for a lot of things for the wedding (food, dj, ceremony decor, etc). All the IL had to pay for was $360 for the harpist & she just wasn’t able to find the money for that. I forgot to mention, she gambles…A LOT. Like has at least 2 credit cards that she’s taken out just to gamble, refinancing their house twice to cover her habit, taking money from her husband w/out him knowing. But money to help her son? Absolutely not.
Darling Husband refuses to let me talk to his mom. He swears up and down he stands up to her, but she just won’t quit. Totally ignoring her and avoiding her and not talking to her is not doing the trick. I think about her 24/7 and I’m just so damn angry. And I know it’s going to break us so fast. I know we will never win and I just feel like giving up. I can’t live like that. Things are just very strained between me and his immediately family.
I woke up this morning and the first thing I thought was, “I’m done. I don’t want to be married anymore. I can’t deal with this.” That was so heartbreaking for me. Yes, she has affected my life in a way where I don’t even want to be w/ her son anymore. Part of it is for my own piece of mind and keeping my sanity intact. Most of it is because I hate putting my husband through this. I know he’s miserable because of her. I don’t want him to go through his life like that either.
I know we would benefit from counseling, but that is not an option at this point because of insurance reasons. I feel ridiculous for feeling this way, but I can’t deal with her anymore.