(Closed) I’m ready to have a baby, FI is not. (long vent)

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
689 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Guys really freaking suck sometimes. I have very similar problems with my Fiance. Sigh.

Post # 4
Member
107 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I think you should be asking the question if you really want to marry Fiance, or if you just want to marry and have a family. It sounds like you two have very different priorities as far as starting a family. Even if I have no idea what I’m talking about on that front, think about this: if he’s so unmotivated and unappreciative of how much work you are doing to support both of you, what will he be like when a baby is born? Will he stay home or will you? Will you have maternity leave? Is it paid? 

Something you could do to better evaluate your options/wait time/etc would be to see your OBGYN and see if you would have any trouble conceiving. Twenty-nine is NOT old for childbearing, so unless you have other medical issues, talking with your doctor might quell some of your fears.

Post # 5
Member
2522 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Yikes.  In some ways, I feel very similarly b/c my Fiance is having trouble getting a job right now and I don’t feel he’s trying hard enough.  I don’t want to nag, but damn, they need to step it up!  Anyways, all I can say is try to stay away from pregnant/baby things.  I know when I start obsessing is when it starts hurting more.  For a while I stayed off weddingbee b/c of all the baby obsession and infertility threads.  You have time still, just remember that.

Post # 7
Member
7293 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

I think a great start would be getting yourself familiar with you cycles off of hormonal interention with charting, etc etc.

Even if you get pregnant right away, you still have 9 or so months to prepare. So looks like it will be past April and gives some time to get a job. It seems more like your Fiance doesn’t feel like he is good enough at the moment with his situation, and really can’t see himself with a baby, since they are extremely burdensome, physically, emotionally , financially. I don’t think your too old for babies quite yet but like others reccomend, get some fertility testing done to see where you stand with eggs and such. As well as your FI’s sperm!

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