(Closed) I’m so angry! Need BEE love, this is long

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
286 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

I’m not try to be insensative because you have been thru hell it sounds like, but family is family….they are never perfect and they usually screw everything up. My family are the most important people to me. If he wants to send his sister a card, let him. The healing has to start somewhere. My FH doesn’t really care for anyone in his family, but i would never want to be the one to hold him back from them. When it comes down to it in the end, family is all we have. My family is my life….and they live 900 miles away. 🙁

Post # 4
Member
73 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

There really is no right answer that anyone can come on here and give you but just try and be happy.  I understand how it can be when you just feel so frustrated that all you can do is just vent about it. But you need to take a deep breath. It really will help you feel better.

 

Post # 5
Member
153 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I understand your issues with his family, but I also understand where he is coming from.  Listen I’m not trying to say that they haven’t done anything wrong, but I lost my brother almost 3 years ago and we didn’t always get along.  He did things that made me very angry and I told him several times how much he was disappointing our family.  Now he is gone and I wish that he could be here and make me as angry as he wanted.  Thankfully we were on very good terms when he passed.  Just realize that you never know when you might lose someone.  Put yourself in his shoes.

Post # 6
Member
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

i absolute agree with previous posters… sometimes in-laws can be downright demons but in the end they are still his family and he cant help but have some love or some feeling of concern for them, despite all the drama they may bring. You must understand that no matter how mad he may be at his family for things they have done in the past he cant just stop loving them or caring  and that he will always feel bound to them one way or the other. In the end its your choice what you want to do but if your trying to make him stay angry at his family when he is trying to let it go, it can backfire against u..  he has known them and loved them much longer than he has known you

Post # 7
Member
447 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

If your husband wants to send his sister a birthday card, let him, but perhaps ask him to leave you out of it. Don’t have your name signed, etc. It’s his family, and he has the right to have contact with them if he chooses, just as you have the right to not have contact with them. I’m not trying to be rude, and I apologize if it comes off that way. I’ve been through this same thing, and I didn’t send my father a Father’s Day card, because he would take it as me opening up communication with him when it’s really the last thing I want.

About the e-mails: Are these coming to you or him or both? If they’re coming to you personally, could you block those addresses from sending you e-mails? I know it’s a hard decision, and not saying that you have to, but if it would create less stress, it might be a good idea. I’ve blocked my father from e-mailing me, because all he does is send nasty e-mails to my husband and then copy myself, my brother, and my sister-in-law in it. I would nearly have panic attacks any time I saw I had an e-mail from him. It was just easier to block him and avoid it.

I’m sorry that you’re going through so much, and I hope that things get resolved.

The topic ‘I’m so angry! Need BEE love, this is long’ is closed to new replies.

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