Post # 16
Thank you. I feel like most people dont understand the extra stress chronic pain causes. I am already stressed and at a breaking point. It is really hard for me to take on more stress if that makes any sense. Unfortunately he can not take any job as he needs to keep studying for interviews in his industry which is a full time job in itself. I’m not blaming him for getting laid off, but the lay-offs (yes they were all lay-offs) have caused a lot of issues in our marriage because we didn’t start it off on a good foundation straight off the bat. There has been no stability in our marriage, that part is really hard for me to deal with. It is really hard to take on someones depression and stress for such long periods of time so early on that you don’t seem to get a break from. I also do not see friends much right now because of the pandemic so unfortunately thats a huge bummer.
I want kids someday…and it makes me wonder how will that work if his jobs are so unstable? His industry in itself is not unstable. So I don’t know I kind of wonder if we are bad luck for eachother? Is that even a thing…because before we got married he was employed for long periods of time? I feel like we are cursed. My chronic pain didn’t flare up until after we were married also…..so I do wonder if all this stress has caused it to get worse.
Post # 17
laid off every time. first time he saw it coming for like many months before hand since he had no work to do for quite a while. I’m upset because this is the 3rd time in a short period of time and he is not very nice to me when hes unemployed.
Post # 18
This sounds incredibly frustrating and stressful. I’m sorry you are going through this. And he should be thankful you are supporting him/ standing by his side, not taking out his anger on you!
you mention that you are too afraid to take days off your pain due to his unemployment. I’m wondering, in an ideal world, if he was steadily employed, how would you balance your pain and work? Are you hoping that eventually when he becomes employed, you might be able to cut back on your hours? If so, You are completely justified in doing so, but it’s something you guys have to agree on, otherwise there might be resentment.
Post # 19
OP, it sounds like you have comebacks for every suggestion being made. Not saying they’re excuses – for example, trying therapy and getting nowhere is absolutely a valid reason to be fed up. My point is that it does sound like you’re truly over it, and it’s not for lack of trying – you truly have. It sounds like you’ve done your best to hang in there. I agree with a PP who said it sounds like you’re kicking the can down the road. You truly sound unhappy and that’s no place for anyone to be.
I’m so sorry and wish you the best of luck. But it sounds like you’d be happier out of this marriage.