(Closed) I'm so pissed off at my dad.

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 17
Member
1462 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

your dad sounds just like my dad. I have a special needs brother (hes brain damaged with autism) and my dad was pretty rough on him especially when we were kids. I too hated my dad. 

My dad also likes the finer things in life and promised to help out financially with the wedding. During our engagement my dad bought a new yacht, a new car etc then told me he was short on cash and couldnt help out financially anymore.

now my mother had words with him and he did pay for the catering in the end but i guess what im saying is, i completely understand your frustration. 

Its not that your being spoilt its broken promises and thats hurtful when it comes from your own father. 

I believe in, if you never had any intention on giving any money then do not offer in the first place. 

I hope it all comes out in the wash for you as it did with my father.

Also my dad told me he bought me a pandora bracelet as a wedding present, only on the the day of the wedding he told me he had to take it back as he needed the cash to buy a part for his boat!!

Post # 18
Member
8700 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

Ugh. I would be SO MAD if my Dad did that!

Post # 20
Member
1462 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@allyfally:  yep! i obviously do not begrudge him spending his own hard earnt cash on himself at all but as i said previously promises are promises. I have learnt as a pp said to keep all the eggs in the basket until they hatch (i love that btw!) and i think you just need to do the same. It sucks but that way any money gifted will be a plesant surprise. 

 

 

Post # 21
Member
2265 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

@allyfally:  You don’t sound like a spoiled brat.  Your Dad sounds very immature and, I”m sorry…selfish.  And like he has a real problem with money.  He reminds me of my brother-in-law who could never stand to have money in the bank – he just HAD to spend it.  

So, you were on the right track when you didn’t let him get your hopes up initially.  I think that you’re going to have to resolve to never, ever expect him to come through on his promises until he actually does.  Telling you he has money and actually giving it to you are two entirely different things, you know?

And even then, who knows…he may have called you in a week or a month to ask for it back. 

Its hard, but you’ll save yourself some aggro if you can just accept him for who he is with NO illusions.  Don’t ever expect him to be anyone other than who he is. 

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