Post # 1
I’m actually an active member posting as anon because I’m slightly embrarassed that I’m having a semi-meltdown. So, please bear with me!
My wedding is about 4 months away. And, my family can’t seem to keep it together. My mother and my maternal grandparents have cause their fair share of drama. I’m so ready to elope!
1. My mother can not stand the sight of my father. (My father doesn’t have any ill feelings towards her.)
2. My mother insisted that I invite all my little cousins because “it is the right thing to do”. Otherwise, all my aunts and uncles will refuse to attend the wedding.
3. My mother/step father just had a big blow out with my sister. I’m siding with my sister because some inappropriate things was said to her.
4. My mother will be giving birth in a month. My patience with her is wearing thin. And, she insists that the baby attend the church ceremony. I will get very upset if I hear the baby cry.
5. My maternal grandparents have told me that a) I am marrying a heathen (the beau will not convert) and b) they would be embrarassed to show up to such a small wedding (which we have made bigger so we can incl. our close friends), c) my marriage will not last because we are not having communion.
This is not turning out to be the wedding I want. We wanted a small wedding and to have the ones we love there but now, it’s a big shiet show waiting to happen.
I’m sitting down with our priest tomorrow to hash out the details. If we elope, I want to be able to do that and then, come back for a convalidation.
Do you have any advice?
Post # 3
Honestly, I would elope! You don’t deserve any of that drama. Take a few supportive friends or family members if you’d like.. or simply book a flight and let it be you two.
Post # 4
Just remember, the wedding is for you and Fiance. You’re not responsible to put on a show or entertain anyone else.
Ask your self: Am I going to enjoy this? Is this worth the effort and money? Will it make Fiance and I happy?
Turn the wedding into a destination wedding! Somewhere far enough that the troublemakers wouldn’t make it.
Post # 5
Awww man, common denominator is mostly your mom and that SUCKS, especially since she’s pregnant and you can’t be all ‘SHUT IT, Ma!’. If it’s turning into too much of a hassle, sounds like eloping is the right path.
You know what makes me sad though? That everybody posts big stuff like this as Anon. I wish you guys were comfortable enough to share this with us as yourselves but I totally understand. 🙁
Post # 6
@badzipper: I second that!
Idea: This was on a “Surprise Wedding” posting yesterday and I think it’s fantastic:
Would it be possible for you to call your vendors, move it up, and scrap the current wedding and tell your family you are having a “engagement party” at night (so the little ones don’t come) and you avoid your mother’s due date? It seems crazy but maybe you could pull it off? And then you wouldn’t have to hear their opinions for the next 4 months.
Regardless, I wish you the best!
Post # 7
Like the others have said, do what makes you and your fiance happy! What you have going on is exactly why I chose to elope, this is our wedding and its ALL about us. Call me selfish, but I do not car AT ALL what anyone else thinks about it.
Post # 8
I cancelled a big wedding and eloped. Couldn’t be happier!
Sorry you have so much dramz…
Post # 9
We had a courthouse ceremony and skipped the drama. I highly recommend it (or eloping)! I’m sorry you’re having to deal with all this, and, frankly, I wouldn’t. I’d call of the big spectacle and do what you want!