Post # 1
Received a wedding invite to our friends’ wedding for next weekend but Darling Husband and I aren’t sure we’re invited to the reception. I’m almost positive we’re not but Darling Husband thinks we are.
What do you think?
+ Wedding invite has the date, time (5:30 pm), and location of the wedding (historical mansion) but nothing about a reception (not even “Reception to follow”)
+ No meal choice option on RSVP card
So…invited or not? Thoughts? (DH thinks its the reception is at the same location and its a buffet so no meal choice options would be necessary)
Either way, we’re going to the ceremony and getting a gift (obviously) but I don’t want to be in an awkward place/position regarding the reception. I most definitely do not want to ask them.
Post # 3
@cooperlove: i think your Darling Husband is probably right. we had a buffet at our wedding so their was no meal choice in the invite. given that the ceremony is at a historical mansion, i’m guessing the reception is there also.
Post # 4
@cooperlove: Do you have any friends going to the wedding that you could talk to about it?
I’m leaning towards you probably ARE invited but I wouldn’t be sure in that case either I guess. Even if it’s in the same place, I would think “reception to follow” would be somewhere on the invite
Post # 5
I think your Darling Husband could be right. It’s customary to put reception to follow on the invitation, but I can see people not thinking about that and just assuming guests will know.
Post # 6
Usually it at least says “Reception to Follow.” Are you close to anyone else that got invited that you would feel comfortable asking them about it?
Post # 7
that’s kind of odd. the wedding is at dinner time so i would imagine there may be something. there was an rsvp so i would say there is probably dinner.
you will have to let us know. i am now curious.
Post # 8
@cooperlove: I’m going out on a limb here, but I’d bet they just overlooked putting “reception to follow” on the invite. My friend helped me to design our invites, and it was overhelming trying to make sure we got everything right–there are so many rules and quirks you never even think about until you actually have to do it.
And as for food, it could be a buffet or maybe not–my meal is a sit-down dinner, but the venue takes the order when the guests sit at their table, so my RSVPs do not have a meal choice on them.
Post # 9
@calibee79: those were his thoughts exactly
@soontobemrsm11: and those were my thoughts! the one thing that keeps coming up in my head is that I contacted her about the appropriate attire for the wedding (since the invite was so formal) and she said, “it’s whatever we want to wear! Like a sundress it fine!” which isn’t want I got from the invite (I’m wearing a nice cocktail dress to be safe!)
@lilbluebird: yeah…that makes sense too!
@MrsBeck: Darling Husband and the groom work together but I’m not 1000% sure the people I know are invited. I don’t want Darling Husband to ask the groom because 1) he most likely doesn’t know since we know how he is, and 2) Darling Husband has no tact or shame
What to do, what to do!?
Post # 10
We don’t put “reception to follow” or have a menu card either – same reason. Reception is in the same place, and it’s a buffet. It’s all detailed on our website but now you have me worried people will be confused! 😛
Post # 11
@cooperlove: I would call and ask. If for no other reason, that it affects your plans for that evening. Though it’s a little intrusive doing this, but if they are inviting all their guests to the reception, then they’ve brought the problem on themselves by not making it clear.
EDIT: Wait, are you saying Darling Husband can’t ask the groom because the groom wouldn’t know?? (Don’t worry about DH’s lack of tact; if it’s just him asking the groom at work then it will only be between those two guys).
Post # 12
@mypinkshoes: I will! I just have an image of me and Darling Husband standing at the reception entrance and not finding our names and someone looking for them and then it becoming a very weird and uncomfortable situation. I’ll let you know if I figure it out!
@PrincessBride27: also very true. we JUST got the invites last week (3 weeks before the wedding) so I’m thinking they we’re trying to get them out in a hurry.
Post # 13
@cooperlove: Hmm…maybe she just wanted really awesome invites so she made them formal! If she didn’t care what you wear….I’m MUCH more leaning towards yes, you’re invited. I’d maybe call & ask “what time is the whole thing over?” instead of saying “are we invited to a reception?” lol
Post # 14
@Bebealways: I may just be over analyzing it. Most people that voted think yes.
@paula1248: how do you word something like that? Would I ask the mother or the bride? I would proabably email it if I do end up asking
Post # 15
@paula1248: Yes, I can pretty much guarentee the groom probably wouldn’t know who’s invited to the reception (this isn’t surprising to me as we’ve been friends for over a year). DH asked him a few weeks back about where they are registered and he had no clue. I ended up googling and FB stalking to find out. And DH’s lack of tact is literaly jaw dropping sometimes so I worry (people either really love Darling Husband or absouletly can’t stand him)
Post # 16
@cooperlove: Just ask! We printed “Reception to follow” on our invitations and still had multiple people ask if dinner would be served. We also got lots of questions about what time the reception would be over from people who needed to plan childcare, work schedules, etc. so I also like a PP’s suggestion to ask that way.