(Closed) I'm tired of everything

posted 4 years ago in Emotional
Post # 31
Member
6635 posts
Bee Keeper

 

Hugs. The PPs have offered some good advice. I just want to send support and it’s impossible to have tried everything–there are new approaches and medications introduced all the time. Everyone is different, there may not be just one medication that helps you, you may need a combination to make a significant difference. I hope your new psychiatrist is helpful. You are fortunate to have such a strong support network. You are not alone.

Post # 34
Member
1256 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

gingerbee88:  Reading your post made me so sad. I’m not in the same situation as you, but I’ve had episodes of severe depression and anxiety in my life, so I can certainly relate to many of the things you said. I’m not in the best space at the moment again, and it’s tough for so many reasons. On top of the actual mental health issues, there are all the emotions about relapsing or not having gotten fully better – frustration, sadness, embarrassment… you name it.

I think I’m starting to accept that feeling happiness and ‘normal’ may never come naturally to me. It’s not as bad as it sounds, and it’s genuinely been quite freeing. I try to remember the strengths that come along with that, such as feeling a lot of compassion for others and their situations, or not taking the good things for granted. But I do feel ‘different’ from a lot of my friends and family, and it’s hard to find people who I can talk to openly about stuff.

Some traits are acceptable to live with, and others are not. It sounds like what you’re dealing with right now is way too much, and I’m confident that working with a new psych will help you take the edge off those challenges. There is absolutely hope and so much to look forward to. It’s amazing how things gradually change or settle with time and even though you may have felt this way for most of your life, I promise there is a future where you no longer have to think and worry about everything, but instead get to live your life in the moment and feel peaceful and content. 

Anyway, I just wanted to reach out and say you are absolutely not alone. I’ve had many ups and downs and as cliche as it sounds, I genuinely feel like I’m a better person for them. You sound like a very smart and insightful woman, but you probably have no idea how strong you are. You got this.

Post # 35
Member
1247 posts
Bumble bee

I wish I could say more to help, but I just wanted to let you know I suffer very badly from hypochondria too, and have done since I was a child. 

It comes and goes. It’s here at the moment and next week I’m due to start some group workshop sessions.

Please don’t give up. I won’t if you don’t! X

Post # 36
Member
196 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Have you tried ECT (electroconvulsive therapy)? It can be really beneficial for people with refractory depression. Also, some of what you are describing sounds a lot like OCD- have you ever been evaluated for that?

  • This reply was modified 3 years, 8 months ago by  paperumbrella.
Post # 40
Member
480 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

gingerbee88:  For me, going on walks and hiking is therapy. I was depressed and I gained so much weight that I felt even worse about myself. I tried prescription meds and had adverse effects. I honestly just felt lost and sad, but everything in my life was okay at the time. I just felt so overwhelmed with sadness, I knew something had to  change.

I started going on long walks around my neighborhood, then I took up serious hiking in the mountains. There is something about just walking, having time to just be, and taking in the fresh air and seeing all of the beautiful flowers and trees that helps me. 

Really is a shame that marijuana is illegal in so many places. I could be going through a hard time emotionally, crying for no reason, and just generally be depressed. But once I smoke a little (maybe try edibles if you can find any), all of the pain and sadness just goes away and I forget why I was sad to begin with. I know not many people advocate marijuana use, but do your own research and make the best decision for yourself. 

Good luck, I am here for you if you ever need to talk.

Post # 41
Member
273 posts
Helper bee

A lot of good advice on here. One thing I would avoid though is smoking weed. It definitely has beneficial effects in a lot of areas but it can also exacerbate mental illness and worsen depression and anxiety. Plus, it’s not regulated in most places so the quality and strength can vary dramatically. I was a psych nurse in an inpatient facility for 5 years and I can say that each patient and their response to medication is different. Often times multi drug therapy is necessary and it can take a while to get the right combo of medications. It’s essentially trial and error. And, even when you find the right combo sometimes you still need adjustments. The very first thing I would do is find a psychiatrist. Not a psychologist or therapist but an actual MD psychiatrist. One that you can see regularly for medication management. Then I would find a psychologist or therapist for therapy. Consider one that utilizes ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy). I’m sorry you’re going through this but I truly believe that it is possible to live a full and happy life in spite of depression and anxiety. 

Post # 42
Member
3529 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

paperumbrella:  this was the first thing that crossed my mind while reading the OP (ECT, not the OCD). 

gingerbee88:  I just want to let you know that we are all here for you. I’ve struggled on and off since I was 14. My life is better (and I feel better) than I could ever imagine for the past 2 years, but I still have times I feel completely overwhelmed and feel hopeless (luckily they aren’t as strong and don’t last nearly as long as they used to- now maybe a couple weeks).  I still fear going backwards and not snapping out after a week or two, and I still think about those dark times quite often. You will be in my thoughts. 

Post # 43
Member
901 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

I’m sorry, Bee! Don’t feel bad or silly, we all have our own things going on and I’m sure we all can empathize with you in one way or another.

Have you tried more natural approaches? Is this something your counsellors suggested? Just small things like open your window every day, so on? These things I know cannot “cure” your depression but for my bf stuff like that really alleviates the symptoms a lot.

Post # 44
Member
196 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

gingerbee88:  I mentioned OCD because of the seemingly obsessive thoughts about illness and death. I believe there is a subset of OCD that is predominantly obsessive traits without the compulsive component. Just something to maybe consider (and discuss with an actual psychiatrist!). I’m sorry that you are dealing with this and I think it’s great that you are working so hard to feel better. 

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