(Closed) I'm upset over something that I know is stupid

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 2
Member
1285 posts
Bumble bee

…… talk about reading into things! Breath and move on. 

Post # 3
Member
1263 posts
Bumble bee

If it’s a phone from  before you were together yeah he probably has stuff on it he doesn’t want you to see having said that if it’s from before you were together why is it even a thing that you care about? 

Post # 4
Member
4179 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

View original reply
katiecat89:  This is going to sound like a crazy idea–but have you tried asking him about it? There may be a very good reason why he hasn’t offered them up to you. My DH dropped his phone last year and shattered it. He had already gotten it replaced, so to do it again would mean buying a whole new phone–it was a whole thing. I had an old iPhone I could have offered him, but didn’t initially. Why? This one had music, photos, and, most importantly, videos of my grandparents who have since passed. I was afraid that he’d break this phone, too. Eventually, I moved everything to a safe spot and gave him the phone, but my point is, if this is someone you claim to love, why can’t you just ask him why he hasn’t offered???

Post # 6
Member
5949 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

View original reply
katiecat89:  I don’t know about you but I probably have like….four or five old phones in my house however I have no idea where they are, if they function or could even work with new network requirements.

It’s likely that the phones he has are still useful for music and things, but not as phones…no secret agenda, no hiding…he just didn’t have one that he thought would work for you.

Post # 7
Member
265 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

I honestly wouldn’t worry about it. He was probably telling the truth that he just didn’t think about it at the time.

And if he didn’t want you to see what was on the phone, I don’t think it’s a big deal. Maybe he had some text messages with an old girlfriend that he thought might make you feel bad or insecure. Personally, if I found out that was the case, I would tell my Fiance that he could’ve just told me that in the first place and I would’ve been fine, he doesn’t need to hide things from me to protect my feelings. But I’d get over it pretty quickly, too.

I think you just need to talk to him about it some more, without accusing him of anything, and then move on.

Post # 8
Member
7365 posts
Busy Beekeeper

— backs out of thread slowly–

Post # 9
Member
7518 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

The only reason to worry about something like this is if he has a history of shady behavior. If he has never before done anything to give you that off feeling, then I def would not worry about this. 

Post # 10
Member
492 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

No it does not sound like maybe he has stuff on there that he doesn’t want you to see or find, it sounds like you are trippin my dear. 

Post # 11
Member
7168 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2016

Um- it’s good you know this is a silly thing to be upset about?

And if you need something ASK for it.

All solved! Have a great weekend!

Post # 13
Member
9519 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

Sweetheart- with love and kindness, why create drama that doesn’t exist? There are enough problems in the world without creating a mountain out of a molehill 

Post # 15
Member
5778 posts
Bee Keeper

View original reply
katiecat89:  More likely he knows how overly-sensitive and insecure you can be (going by the tone of your post) and knew if he lent you an old phone you’d immediately do a full recon on it and get all upset and teary eyed over any evidence of past female interaction, even if it was from a time  before you were a couple. And he prob couldn’t even remember what, if anything was on there but just didn’t want to take the chance. 

I’m honestly not trying to be mean to you, but sweetie you sound like you’re your own worst enemy and this kind of behaviour will only hurt you and your relationship. Chill, for your own sake. 

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