Post # 1
My fiancÃ© and I are having a very small wedding of no more than 30 guests because we simply cannot afford more than that. It will be immediate family only, plus 2 friends each. My fiancÃ© doesn’t really have any extended family, but I have 9 uncles, 8 aunts and 16 first cousins who I usually see once a year and keep in contact with. Both of my parents are upset that their brothers and sisters won’t be coming to the wedding and I feel really bad about not inviting them. My mom has hinted to them that it will be a small wedding, but none of them know that they aren’t invited and now they are assuming that they are invited. How do I tell them that they aren’t? I was thinking about sending out an e-mail to let them know and why. Not that they aren’t loved and that I don’t want them there, just that I don’t have the money to more than double my guest list. What would you do in this situation? How would you tell them? Thanks in advance!
Post # 3
I would NOT send out an email just to say they’re not invited. If possible, you could have a very informal party or something to celebrate your marriage and invite them to that. That way you could send an email that says something like “The wedding itself will be a very small, immediate-family-only event, but we would love it if you came to our backyard BBQ the next week in celebration of our marriage.” Another thing you could do is think of some way to include them without having them actually present. For example, you could ask them each to send you a square of fabric and you could make a quilt out of it, or they could send you quotes that you compile into a collage or something. That way you can tell them all that although it isn’t possible for them to be there physically, they will be there in spirit.
Post # 4
We’re having a very small wedding (26 people total) with basically immediate family. I started referring to it as an “elopement with just close family”. I haven’t had any issues with my friends or family. Fiance has said he’s had some issues (but he’s people pleaser and hates disappointing people) but once he explains they’ve accepted it, even if they don’t understand it. I realize it’s not technically an elopement, but it’s worked for explaining for us.
I had one aunt who I was really worried about, since she’s not invited. When I said it’s a small elopement type wedding she was fine and understood.
Post # 5
I dedinitely agree with missbananabread on this one. Id do exactly what she said. Mabe having an informal get together to celebratenyour marriage after the wedding. I think theyd understand.