Post # 17
We are getting married without an engagement ring. I feel very strongly about most traditions, but this wasn’t one of them. Even if my fiance wasn’t a graduate student, I would have a hard time seeing it as anything other than a waste of money (for me- I’m not passing judgement on anyone else- if you want one, then it isn’t a waste) and I have huge issues with the gem industry in general and the diamond industry in specific.
It turns out, that my mother had never wanted one either. She likes jewelry (more than I do), but she didn’t see the point in an engagement ring (my dad ended up buying her one the day before the wedding, because he didnlt believe her). One of my best friends doesn’t have one either.
We are, however, going to have wedding rings, as that to me, symbolizes the union more than an engagement ring.
Post # 18
Mine is special to me because it is a combination of what both of us wanted. He wanted a solitaire, I wanted something completely different than anything anyone else I knew had. It’s also special to me, because it is one of two (soon to be three!) real pieces of jewelry I own. The other is a ring my mother gave to me for my 16th birthday.
Post # 19
@Dancy – Thanks! It was something I was kind of stressed about, I didn’t want to hear comments like ‘oh you’re being different just for the sake of being different’ or ‘you’re just trying to make some kind of political statement’, but I also didn’t want something that I didn’t feel any real connection with or desire for. Then on the trip when we found all these pretty stones it became a good compromise between tradition and our individual taste.
Thanks for all the stories! I love hearing about what thinking everyone else was doing since I pondered what I wanted for a long while.
Post # 20
Mine is important to me because my fiance designed it for me and also a symbol of how far he has come since we dated. When we started dating, he had no held a job longer than 6 months, he was broke all the time, generally irresponsible. He didn’t tell me this till after we got engaged but he said what he loved about me was that I made him a better man. He shaped up because he knew if he didn’t I would leave him and he didn’t want to lose the best thing that happened to him. It’s a one carat, nearly flawless ring, in an art deco setting. I wouldn’t have any other ring.
Post # 21
I’ve loved reading these messages! It’s nice to know you’re not alone in your feelings and your desires, no matter how rational or irrational they are.
On the one hand, I never wanted an engagement ring. On the other hand, I wanted one very badly. In favor of not having one, I really didn’t want to have to worry about choosing a ring. For tiny things, they’re exceptionally complicated!
Well, I didn’t have to. I’m wearing the exact engagement ring that my fiance’s mother wore when they were married in 1967. The diamond was originally purchased by my fiance’s paternal grandmother in 1948 in Europe. So, I’m the third woman to wear this ring. Which is a remarkable, remarkable honor.
Thanks for this thread.
Post # 22
- Wedding: January 2011 - Vintage Villas
My ring is very special to me!! Two of the diamonds were from my FI’s great aunt’s ring that was passed down to his mom, and the middle diamond was GOING to be a ring from his grandmother’s ring, but his mom really wanted to hold on to it – so she actually bought him a diamond to go in the middle. He really didn’t want to let her buy it, but she insisted because he had always thought he’d be getting that diamond but when the time came to actually let go of the diamond she was just too sentimental. It was so sweet of her to do that!
I love that all three of the diamonds in my ring have some sort of a story behind them!