Post # 1
A few months ago, I posted that after my fiance got a new job, we both agreed that we could afford to upgrade my ring. I didn’t want a crazy upgrade, I just wanted to bump up my diamond from a half carat to somewhere just under a carat. I was under the impression that this would be an easy fix…but noooo.
So, I finally got him to go into the ring store with me because my ring needed to be cleaned and redipped anyways. While there, I asked the jeweler about the possibility of getting a bigger diamond…..and, according to him, there is no way that a bigger diamond will fit my current setting. I could only go up to a .6, which is not really worth it. So then, I asked if there was any way to add a halo to my ring to give the effect of a bigger diamond…no go there either. So basically, I have a ring that I will never be able to upgrade without getting an entirely new ring. (Oh! And I did think about just getting a new setting with a halo to make the diamond look bigger, but my FI piped up and reminded me that he hates them, grrr)
Anyways, this post is not meant to start a debate on whether or not I should upgrade. My fiance and I agreed that both of us are fine with upgrading (so please, no comments on “the true meaning of the ring” or how I must be hurting my FI’s feelings) . I just wondered if any of you have been in my shoes. I was hoping I could keep some part of the original ring, but now that option isn’t there (unless I ultimately decide against upgrading). Have any of you decided against the upgrade once you found out you couldn’t keep any part of your old ring? Or if you decided to go ahead with the upgrade, were you happy with it, or do you miss the original ring?
I guess the hardest part is that I really do love my ring! Or, at the very least, I love my setting. I just wish it would fit a bigger stone. But maybe that answers my question. Maybe I should just get a very similar setting that accomodates a bigger stone? Gah, just lend me your thoughts! (But again, please be kind!!!)
Post # 3
@rosie.jonesy.9: picture of your setting? I had an opportunity to get a huge upgrade diamond but the jeweler told me my setting wouldn’t accomodate it as well. It was pretty disappointing. I ended upgrading slightly from a .75 ct to a 1 ct and I just had to raise the prongs so that the diamond sat higher in the setting. I actually like the look better. I can see that if I got the much larger diamond, the diamond would have had to sit ridiculously high though.
Post # 4
@rosie.jonesy.9: I think you should post a pic as well. How fun that you are diamond shopping! Can you keep the original ring for an heirloom?
Post # 5
Have you tried getting a second oppinion? I know that when SIL and I replaced the diamond in MIL’s engagement right the first place we went were trying to talk us into a 1-1.5 ct diamond because ‘that is what was origionally in this ring’, ummm no no it was no where near that. The second place we went to what much more realistic and said that although we could do that (riiiiight) that X was the origional size. They also gave us all kinds of neat options if we wanted them, although were so understanding that we wanted to keep the ring as origional as possible.
EDIT: also is there some reason that you could just not replace the head of the ring if the origional is not condusive to what you are looking at?
Post # 6
I had not thought about an upgrade until DH suggested it, but it never occurred to me to attempt to change my existing setting. Most rings, unless they are very basic solitaires, cannot simply have a new head put on it to hold a bigger stone because most settings are designed to hold stones of a certain size. We knew we would keep the original and buy something entirely new, so it didn’t bother us. Are you intending to trade your current stone/ring in when you get a new one? I think having a setting remade to hold a larger stone is a good compromise if you like your setting and are going to get a larger stone.
Post # 7
@rosie.jonesy.9: I got an entirely new ring for our 5 year anniversary. I actually don’t like the idea of “keeping some part of the original ring” because then you’d have to mess up the first ring. I kept my original ring exactly like it was as a keepsake/heirloom. I think your situation is a blessing in disguise and you should get a whole new setting so you can have both! Good luck!
Post # 8
You could also always get a new ring and pop a cz or colored stone into the original setting to wear as a RHR or stand in – that’s what I plan on doing with mine.
Post # 9
Aww sweetie, that’s too bad! My take on it is that I you should change out the entire ring to get your upgrade 😉
I changed out my initial e-ring after 1 year because the setting was too fragile and the gemstone I picked out was scratched up. 6 months after getting married, I changed my wedding band for a custom-fitting one. And now 1.5 years after marriage, I am adding a rose gold band to my set. So my set has continually evolved into something I love more and more 🙂 My husband is completely fine with all of it, since I pay for any changes 😉
It’s too bad your SO doesn’t like halos and this means you won’t get one. I proposed to my SO and told him he could change out the engagement band I gave him because what mattered most to me was that he was happy. He ended up keeping it throughout our engagement and for our wedding ceremony, but he got himself a different band for daily wear after that. I don’t mind at all!
Post # 10
I went through the exact same thing. We ended up trading in my entire original ring for a new one. They applied the credit to the new ring and we paid for the difference. I am very happy with the result of it all.
Post # 11
- Wedding: June 2010 - parent's backyard
I feel like most upgrades I see involve an entirely new ring, so I’m not surprised. like PPs suggested, is there any way the head/prongs could be replaced? or I agree with other suggestions of selling the diamond, keeping the old setting and putting a less expensive stone in it.
Post # 12
I was in this exact situation. I loved everthing about my ring, except after browsing the Bee I got ring envy and wanted to up my center stone from .47ct to .75-1ct. Unfortunately my setting couldn’t accomodate that size, so I had to remake the whole ring. Fiance was hurt at first, but agreed to me getting a whole new ring instead of altering the original ring he proposed with. The original ring sits in a box, and maybe one of our kids can use it one day. To me, a ring is just a ring, and if I’m the one wearing it every day then I want to make sure it’s everything I want. Maybe one day I’ll get to up my center stone from 1.1 to 1.5. A girl can dream!
Post # 13
Same thing happened to me. When we got the ring they said the setting would accommodate a bigger diamond which was not true. I was a little bummed that I couldn’t keep my original ring but I was able to put the value of it towards a different ring that I love just as much as the original. They asked if I wanted to trade in my wedding band as well but that was a no go. My wedding band is more important to me than the engagement ring.
Post # 14
Here is a pic of my current ring. The picture is decieving though because my fingers are on the smaller side, so the diamond looks bigger than it is. It is really a .47 (just under half a carat).
Unfortunately there is no way that I can get a bigger diamond to fit my current setting. I had my doubts to begin with because after doing some research, it appears that you need to have a peg-head to easily switch the size of the stone. I know there are some exceptions, but because my setting has built in surprise diamonds on either side of the setting, it is basically impossible to modify the setting.
Thank you to everyone who has commented! I do appreciate your thoughts and your general kindness! It made it easier to hear that many people do indeed have to switch out the old engagement ring for the new. And I do have the option of putting the price of my old ring towards a new one. I think I am going to hold off on upgrading for a bit longer, make sure it is really what I want, but you all have made the decision a little easier.
Post # 15
I got a whole new ring and set aside my original one to be passed down as a heirloom.
Post # 16
- Wedding: June 2010 - parent's backyard
@rosie.jonesy.9: it’s hard to tell from that picture, but I’m guessing those priongs are some kind of basket with the shank soldered to the sides. you could get it removed and replaced with a larger basket. that would make the the entire ring bigger, so you would need to size it down. it won’t be cheap, but it’s a possiblity if you really want to upgrade and keep that band.