- 5 years ago
- Wedding: August 2012
I put “friends” in quotations because at this point that’s debatable.
I’m in my thirties and so are the people in my core group of “friends.”
The short story is: in the last 3 years, my husband and I have gotten engaged, bought a house, got married, and had a baby. Naturally, we’ve been very excited about all those things.
Since we got engaged, we have felt more and more of a frosty treatment from our “friends,” and we have continued to wonder why we suddenly were being left out and kept out of the loop when previously we had been very tight with these people. The friendships started to feel very strained and one sided, with us always keeping up the connection – giving and not getting much in return.
Well my husband’s brother finally came clean and told my husband that basically, our “friends” are sick of us. They are sick of hearing about our life and talk about us every time we aren’t there. This has been going on for almost 3 years and no one had the decency to tell us. So now we have very strained friendships with people who are talking behind our back every chance they get and we have been slowly cut out of the group.
I find this very immature for a group of mid thirty year olds, but the guys in the group are my husband’s oldest friends and the trouble didn’t start until I came into his life and our life took off. So I feel responsible for this fallout.
We are also both very hurt to find out that we have been the topic of gossip for a very long time stemming from our happy life events.
Do we try and get back in the good books by going quiet for a while and getting some distance? Honestly, even if it’s my fault for boring people with our life, I don’t know if I could trust these “friends” again anyway. We have to downplay our life to stay friends with people? That seems quite frankly, dumb to me, especially at this age, but maybe I’m missing something.
Advice? Thank you, I’m mostly concerned about my husband losing his oldest buddies seemingly because of me.