(Closed) In-Law Woe's. Help. Please.

posted 6 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Hostess
1427 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Since this is being held in Delaware, can your IL’s enforce a NO DOG policy and just state that you all want to enjoy holidays without the stresses of dogs around? EVERYONE will then board their beloved pooches for a few days instead of bringing all the dogs around.

Post # 4
Member
6221 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House

@missporkchops:  +1. If your inlaws won’t do it, then I just wouldn’t go. Your Brother-In-Law isn’t respectful of his family or his dogs in the way he is treating everything and that isn’t fair to anyone. Next time you visit, I would stay in a hotel and only meet them outside of their home.

Post # 5
Member
1399 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@AnonBeeLee:  ugggh. poor babies. my Future Mother-In-Law just got a puppy and it’s shitting & pissing everywhere… not this poor thing’s fault- she’s a baby and doesn’t know where the right place to do that is. Someone has to train her and spend time with her… I feel you.

I agree with you ILs enforcing a NO DOGS ALLOWED rule. Get petsitters and call it a day!

Post # 7
Member
4439 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall

@AnonBeeLee:  First off, IMO there are no “AWFUL AWFUL AWFUL dogs” only AWFUL AWFUL AWFUL owners, which looks like is the case here.

I’m not sure why you’re Brother-In-Law wants to drag three ill-behaved dogs across several states, but at the same time spending Xmas alone sounds really lonely to me.

Can you go to see the family, especially seeing as a) it’s been planned and b) you haven’t seen them in awhile but stay in a hotel therefore limiting your exposure to the terrible dogs?  And your in laws should at least inforce no dogs TIME … like put them in another room while food is being eaten, presents are being opened, etc.  

I love animals, but that does sound stressful.  I have friends who are very strict with their dog and just hearing them yell at the poor thing (who is really not being that bad) stresses me out both from the yelling and in sympathy!

Post # 8
Member
11747 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I think your husband should be honest with his parents and tell him you guys are probably not goign to make it given the dogs, to at least give them a heads up so they can handle it for future years.  I totally wouldn’t go – I love dogs but am scared of bigger dogs when they’re jumping all over you and it would just annoy me and ruin my holiday.

Post # 9
Member
2105 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Can your husband talk to his brother about how the dogs scratch you guys? As for the pee and poop, I really doubt your mil and fil would be okay with it. I say go if your bil and husband talk it out. 

Post # 12
Member
4439 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall

@AnonBeeLee:  YIKES!  I always feel like the people yelling (if they’re not disciplining makes it worse).

Can you go on a shorter trip that you can afford to stay in the hotel and board puppy if necessary?

Then when you’re leaving two days before everyone else I’d slip in a “Love to stay but your dogs are driving me nuts!!!” and something about your sweet dog waiting to see you at home 😉

Post # 13
Member
2425 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

@AnonBeeLee:  This is a tough situation!  If this has already been said, I apologize as I haven’t read all the responses yet.  Has anyone directly talked to the brother and his wife about their dogs?  I’m wondering if they knew that their dogs were directly hurting the relationship w/ the family if they would do something.  Honestly, they sound like lazy dog owners and the cynical side of me says they probably won’t change.  I understand that dogs have accidents.  I have a dog myself (great dane mix) and she has an accident every now and again.  But to relieve themselves right there when their owners are there???  Just sounds like they were never taught.  My pets are my babies too.  My dog isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, ESPECIALLY my dad’s. lol When we travel to their house, our dog is only allowed inside when it’s time to go to bed.  Their house.  Their rules.  It’s just the polite thing along with common sense.  I wish your inlaws would see the light on this one!

Post # 14
Member
9884 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@AnonBeeLee:  Oh, wow, that’s downright unbelievable.  I love dogs, too, but that’s a completely unacceptable situation and I’d never put myself into it willingly.  I don’t blame you a bit.

What I would do is find a way to spend as little time with any of your IL’s as possible.  How about make a date for the family to meet at a restaurant?  Call ahead and make group reservations for a holiday lunch or dinner.  That way you can visit the people and they have no choice but to leave their unruly canine children at home.

I wish you all the best with this!

Post # 16
Member
11747 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

why don’t you give them a gift certificate for obedience lessons for their dogs for xmas?! 😉 Only half kidding but maybe it will do the trick!

I have low tolerance for people who do not train or have their dogs trained properly. It’s doing a huge disservice to the dogs, as well as everyone that has to be in contact with them. I cannot stand irresponsible dog owners!

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