(Closed) In-laws gave us money, I’m livid!

posted 8 years ago in Money
Post # 3
Member
1765 posts
Buzzing bee

Is this her idea of an apology?  Or what?  Was this in a card?  A wedding card?  Hmmmm

Post # 5
Member
965 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

People are wierd and show their affection in different ways. Send a brief, friendly thank you card, and never speak of it again. Lol.

Post # 6
Member
988 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Weird…also $1,000 seems kinda cheap to me. I mean obviously $1,000 is a lot of money but if they are super rich like you say they are and it’s the first time they are giving you any money seems like a handout. I would be just as mad especially if there was no note or a call to go along with it.

Post # 7
Member
626 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Maybe she’s trying to apologize. Some people just aren’t good with starting that conversation. If I were you I would just invite her to lunch and talk it out… after all you’re relationship is about to be life long.. might as well try to get it off on the best start. If she declines or gets nasty– just take the high road… in fact its safe to always take the high road when it comes to your Mother-In-Law

Post # 9
Member
2788 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

For some people money replaces emotional obligations, like apologizing.

Its a hard call, to keep or return it . To be honest I would be pissed too…Kudos to your Fiance for calling them out on their antics

Post # 10
Member
1426 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

What on earth!? Maybe that’s intended to be a peace offering?  Some people are really awkward about expressing that they are sorry.  I would be cautious but wait until you see how they act in the future.  You don’t want to have a bad relationship with them forever, so play it by ear and see if they try to be nice to you from now on (indicating that they are sorry) or it they try to hold the money over your (indicating that they were trying to buy you off).  It could really go either way…

Post # 12
Member
3762 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

If you really need the money then I would cash it and send a thank you note. 

It may be her way of appoligizing which isn’t much but its something.  You can try to fight fire with fire but it usually doesn’t get you very far. 

Post # 13
Member
831 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I’m so happy to hear your Fiance stood up for you! He’s a keeper!

Post # 14
Member
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

What?? I agree while $1000 isn’t anything to shake a stick at, it’s still not really ‘that much’ money, especially if they are so rich. I am a little confused about what you are supposed to put that towards? eloping without them??

Post # 16
Member
134 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I think you should send the check back to her in that Mother’s Day card that you posted about earlier.  She sounds like someone who doesn’t give anything without it having strings attached.

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