Post # 1
So, Hubby and I have been together for about 4 years now – pushing 5. And I love him to death and all but lets be honest…. after some time, the spark starts to dim.
He isnt really into langerie or sexy outfits. We have sex probably once a month or twice a month. He is 23 and I am 26. shouldnt we be in our prime?!?!? lol
I think he is sexy and he compliments me a pretty decent amount- but I dunno…. I just need some new ideas.
Or does anyone know of any good toys that we could start with?
We used to use a few like Vibrators and C*** Rings but it just started to get boring.
I have always been a VERY sexual person. Talking like if I didnt get it everyday I would freak out. But id say that in the past 6 months or so its deff gone away. I know he isnt seeing anyone else or anything like that and he never would. but its not eeven just for him…. I (CAPITAL I) and in need of excitement!!!!
HELP LADIES!!!!!!! 🙂
Post # 3
98% of great sex is enthusiasm…the rest is costuming and not getting a leg cramp halfway through
Post # 5
@MeganTacky2247: “He isnt really into langerie or sexy outfits.”
do you know this for sure? has he seen you in any sexy lingerie? I know some guys say this because they’ve never seen a girl dress up for them so if you’ve never tried it i would give it a shot. I mean what guy wouldnt want to see his girl in barely there undies?
I dont really have any other suggestions. being spontaneous always works. try to have sex with him in the kitchen or somewhere random where you guys dont usually get it on.
Post # 6
maybe watch some porn together to get you both in the mood?
surprise him by waking him up with a bj?
I’ve heard that the less women have sex, the less they want sex.
Post # 7
The Shower. It’s a very sexy place…get yourself a detachable shower head if you don’t already have one. Rev yourself up before he gets in, and then put the moves on him. Worked for us when we were in a rut…
Post # 8
@Nona99: Haha!!! Oh, leg cramps…
Post # 9
My husband and I have been together for 6 years, married for 2 years. My best advice is don’t make it routine. (Unless that is your sort of thing.)
Come on to him when he least expects it. Try new positions often. Go from oral to sex back to oral then back to sex to make it last longer. Touch each other more often. And by this I mean while watching a movie stroke his hand or leg. You would be surprised by how many times we were in our pj’s ready for a night of relaxation and netflix that turned into a night of hot passion just by a few sweet touches.
Also be vocal to him about it. Tell him straight up you are a woman with needs. Tell him you do not feel satisfied with the amount of sex you two are having. Make sure he knows you are very satisfied with the sex in general but you want more. If you are not happy with how the sex is playing out, change it up like I said above. Take control. 🙂
Post # 10
Thanks ladies! Yea I think I just need to change it up.
I do the BJ thing like once a month when we are both off (we get 1 day off a week together… sometimes) but after he is done, im just done too. As in “OK, what do you want for breakfast?”
I just havent been in the mood and I dont really know why.
I think I am going to give Langerie another shot. I have ALWAYS used that until I met DH. He just said he would rather me be naked.
So I pretty much am naked when I get ready for work in the morn and getting ready for bed – (I sleep naked most of the time) Maybe im beign TOO naked and I need to take it away from him. lol. Then he will want it more?? haha
Post # 11
@Sweet.Sugar.Rose THank you!!!! I love this!
I think what I need to do is even if im not in the mood I just need to force myself to be.
Post # 12
@MeganTacky2247: Where you said you are not in the mood sometimes, tell him that. Tell him to make you in the mood. (More kissing, neck kissing, touching of the body, oral, before sex.) Sometimes I may not be in the mood but my husband gets me that way by those things mentioned above and then once we start having sex I am so glad we did. haha
Post # 13
@MeganTacky2247: You’re welcome! 🙂 lol
Post # 15
ok I was in the same boat for a while because my SO/FI/FH and I come from two different schools of sexuality.
I like it alot
It isn’t that important to him.
The plus side is that you guys have time on your hands. I will admit when my SO and i first started making love we didn’t really connect, But eventually we learned what eachother liked.
One day I started getting really frustrated and started saying NO to him. I started denying him easy access to my boobies and all of a sudden he is sniffing around me like something i’ve never seen.
I realized that it wasn’t Sexy that he found sexy. It was COMFY that he found sexy. I swear, sports bra and Peace sign PJ bottoms are the sexiest thing in the world to him. especially when i start doing yoga in the living room. He likes it when I am relaxed…and when I fight him off a little bit.
I will tell you what is not sexy…
“What’s going on with our sex life?” “Why won’t you touch me?” (Guilty!)
My Ex (and First) made me believe what happened when we humped was 92% of what a relationship was. It wasn’t until I got with my FI that I came to understand that Sex between a loving and commited couple didn’t have to happen every freaking night. That when we made love (or called it something else) it was about connecting with him.
My FI taught me a lot about what is sexy. And sex all the time…Not so sexy… who knew?
I know my situation was slightly different from yours but I hope my story helped some.
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Post # 16
Once or twice a month is definitely not enough. I would def mix it up. Sex in the morning before work is always a good way to start the day! They sell those cosmo sex game books. (Its the little one) I bought it for a friend she thanked me endlessly lol. Try different lingerie, rabbit, porn, sensual massage. & be vocal about what you want. Take control.