(Closed) In what order do you want the big things to happen in your life?

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Whick order do you prefer?

    Moving in, get engaged, get married. I would never have it any other way.

    Get engaged, get married, move in (on wedding day or after). I would never have it any other way.

    Get engaged, move in, get married. I would never have it any other way.

    Moving in, get engaged, get married. But I'm flexible.

    Get engaged, get married, move in (on wedding day or after). But I'm flexible.

    Get engaged, move in, get married. But I'm flexible.

    I don't care.

    I don't know.

    Other: share! :D

  • Post # 17
    Member
    151 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    Move in, get engaged, get married. That was my prefered and the way it happened – it was important for both of us to live together first.

    Post # 18
    Member
    903 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    Move in, get engaged, get married, GRADUATE! Lol i dont think i would feel comfortable marrying someone ive never lived with… What if theyre disgustingtingly messy, or strict like a military sargent? What if they have expectations that I would be resppnsible for all of the cooking and cleaning? I would want to know this before being legally bound to them for the rest of my life…

    Post # 19
    Member
    6518 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: September 2013

    @HopefulCatlover:  I was raised very old fashioned. My mom told me to get engaged first before moving in with someone. And thays what I did and SO was raised that way too. 

    Get engaged, move in a few months before the wedding to get settled, get married. We moved in 7 months before the wedding

    Post # 20
    Member
    1834 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    We moved in together after dating for about 1.5 years, got engaged about 2.5 years later and just got married last October after being engaged for a little over 1 year. 

    Post # 21
    Member
    722 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    View original reply
    @This Time Round:  1+ i feel like you learn so much more about somebody living with them, i would never get engaged/married without living with them first

    Post # 22
    Member
    2664 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2015 - Ketchum, ID

    @HopefulCatlover:  Well, considering we’re already living together, getting engaged and then married are the only two options left, in that order. Even if we weren’t moved in together, though, I wouldn’t get engaged to someone without living with them first. 

     

    Post # 23
    Member
    2452 posts
    Buzzing bee

    View original reply
    @spezia:  You don’t have to answer if this is too personal for you, but what sorts of things did you find out while living with your ex that you didn’t know before and that were negative? Are these things that you would not have known if you had just spent increasing amounts of time with him?

    Post # 24
    Member
    3125 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: December 2017

    We lived together before getting engaged, he proposed, we bought a house together, and then we got married. It worked out well for us, although planning a wedding and buying a house at the same time was THE MOST stressful situation of our entire lives.

    Post # 25
    Member
    2890 posts
    Sugar bee

    @HopefulCatlover:  The only thing I would never compromise about is moving in together first. I can’t imagine getting engaged to someone I don’t *know* on a daily basis. People show their true colors when they live together 24/7. I don’t care if I don’t ever get married, it’s not a priority in my life. We’re engaged but if it was to stay that way or just change our minds and sign common-law contracts before purchasing our first house I’d be happy. But living with the man I love is something I need and want more than anything else. 

    Post # 26
    Member
    11506 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2009

    This is a great poll question! 

    I voted “get engaged, get married, move in (on or after the wedding day.) I wouldn’t have it any other way.” 

    Although this was not one of the milestones that you included in your poll options, my required sequence of events also involved waiting until after marriage before having sex.

    Post # 27
    Member
    445 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    I dont care what order as long as they happen 

    but then I would never agree to marry someone I wasnt living with 

    Post # 28
    Member
    1671 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    Get engaged -> Move in -> Get married, but flexible.

    We ended up moving in together pre engagement because DH wanted to live together for 6 months to a year first… He is always a man of his word, so I trusted him on this and moved in after some deliberation. After 6 months, he asked me what type of ring I might like. 2 months after that we were engaged, so it worked out just right. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Some people told me that moving in together changes EVERYTHING, but I didn’t think so. We were together for over 7 years first though and had travelled together quite a bit so I think I saw pretty much everything by then.

    Post # 29
    Member
    228 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    Start dating–move in– buy a house-get pregnant-have a baby- get engaged- get married:)

    all has happened except the wedding. It’s coming up this June!

    Post # 30
    Member
    1130 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2014

    Initially, I always wanted it to be “get engaged, move in, get married…”, however that all went out the window. FH was a foreign exchange student when I met him, we dated for the entire school year and he went back to Serbia for 5 months over the spring/summer break, so we were an LDR. Then he got a visa to continue studying here, but only had like $100 and no place to live and no job. So he moved in with me.

    Didn’t bother me at all since we had been together for a year at that point. He started working and it all worked out.

    So we moved in, got engaged, and the next thing is getting married.

    Also, later on I learned that because he isn’t Canadian (and I am), to apply for a marriage license in Ontario you need to have 2 years of concrete proof of your relationship. It’s so they can weed out the people just having quick fake marriages so they can get citizenship. So living together really helps that, because we get all our mail at one address and that kind of stuff.

    The topic ‘In what order do you want the big things to happen in your life?’ is closed to new replies.

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