Inappropriate time to be a bridesmaid?

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
638 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

If she’s a good enough friend that you’re considering having her as a bridesmaid, there’s no harm in asking. But, I would be prepared for her to possibly say no since many of your events may coincide with her being in the thick of the final stages of wedding planning. 

Post # 3
250 posts
Helper bee

If she asked you the same thing, would you say yes? Are you already a bridesmaid in her wedding party? If you are, then she should and would likely say yes.

I think as long as you are considerate and understand she won’t be able to necessarily do every bridesmaid task, then it should be fine.

Post # 4
2343 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

It sounds like you are close with her since you are considering asking her to be a bridesmaid, so I would just talk to her very openly and tell her you’d love for her to be in the bridal party but understand if that’s asking a lot since she will have a lot going on with her own wedding. If she declines, don’t take it personally- she can still support you and attend as a guest!

Post # 5
3350 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

View original reply
svargas :  i was a bridesmaid in a wedding of one of my bridesmaids – two weeks apart! It was totally fine and lots of fun. I think the only consideration was that she delayed her honeymoon (her wedding was two weeks before mine). 

Post # 6
47412 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

If you are good friends, you can ask her, but let her know that you are aware that the timing may not be the best for her, and your feelings will not be hurt, if she chooses to decline.

Even the financial aspects of being a Bridesmaid or Best Man may be too much for her, given that her wedding is one month before yours.

Post # 7
3804 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

Of course you can ask! And if you don’t expect her to organise stuff for you I don’t see why it would be a burden. 

Just give her an easy out if you’re worried about it – “I would love for you to be my bridesmaid, I know your own wedding is around that time as well though so I won’t be offended if you think it might be too much!”

Post # 8
170 posts
Blushing bee

I think it is much better to ask than assume she can’t! Especially since you have such an understanding attitude about it going into it.

My friend asked me to be her bridesmaid even though I had my wedding a month prior… then she followed it up with “I was going to ask you to be Maid of Honor but I knew that would be too much, so I asked ____ instead.” Haha safe to say I wish she had asked me first rather than assumed, but it’s all good and I am happy to be taking part in her big day 🙂  

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