Infertility POAS- July 2020

posted 2 years ago in TTC
Post # 437
Member
381 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: Florida

Oh friend, I’m no expert but I think it’s normal to grieve that you lost all your embryos! Does your clinic have a counselor/therapist? It might be helpful to talk to someone before your next cycle to just talk through your fears. 

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@jen9999:  

Post # 438
Member
381 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: Florida

Had my first monitoring appt today. Got my doses changed and I’m now on bed rest. Which was expected. Things are looking good so far. Fingers crossed. 

Post # 439
Member
788 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@candy08:  I hope your bw shows you can start meds. It’s nice when you can be out of the waiting period and start feeling like you’re doing something to contribute to the process. I hope that you have an easier time adjusting to the estrace than I did. I had a rough few days, but I felt better once I realized what was happening with my emotions. 

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@southernbellewindycity:  I’m sorry you’re on bedrest. Do you have to stay that way until after the egg retrieval? Hopefully you don’t have too much longer to go.

Post # 440
Member
517 posts
Busy bee

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@southernbellewindycity:  thank you so much, finger crossed for everything to go smoothly. 

I’m basically trying to go two hour intervals before hysterically crying again. I can’t believe how devastated I am. I just never believed it wouldn’t work for me. First, I had the failed micro dose and now all my embryos died…I’m just trying to keep my head up. On the upside I’m talking to my RE tomorrow so hopefully he has a better plan forward. And my period started today so I’m going in for blood work tomorrow. Fingers crossed this cycle is better than the previous two. 

Post # 441
Member
4430 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

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@jen9999:  I am really sorry you are struggling. I have struggled myself a lot through this process. There are so many mixed emotions and it feels like you’re constantly on pins and needles and waiting for an outcome of some sort. You can literally never relax… 

so I don’t know anyone IRL who has experienced this however, I have been a lurker on babycenter for many years and I find that there are many, many women who have been where you are that are very supportive. Another Infertility community that is helpful is inspire, you should check them both out. I find the infertility boards on the bee are just a microcosm of the larger infertility community with many more people who are going through a myriad of different things. 

Post # 442
Member
4430 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

Update/rant:

2 embryos from the fertilized eggs made it to blasts. I was pretty ok with it, it’s the same as the first cycle. Now have to wait to see what PGS says….

when I said that number to two people, my Mother-In-Law, who I love but also who I might be overstaring to and that stops today, and my acupuncturist. BOTH of them responded with, “that’s it?!?!” 

so that made me feel like fucking shit. 

Post # 443
Member
788 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

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@Cheekie0077:  I’m sorry you only got two embryos, but hopefully at least one of those is PGS normal. I’m sorry your Mother-In-Law and acupuncturist were so insensitive. I’m sure they were just trying to be empathetic, but that kind of comment isn’t helpful. It’s fine for you to be disappointed but when other people say stuff like that it just feels like they are judging you, which sucks. I honestly know that I wouldn’t have known how to react to people with fertility issues until I went through it myself. I try to keep that in mind when I get “helpful” comments from others, but it still hurts. 

Post # 444
Member
517 posts
Busy bee

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@Cheekie0077:  that’s amazing that you got two!!! I’m so hopeful for you that they test well. 

I’m sorry your family wasn’t more supportive, but I’m so excited for you!

Post # 445
Member
12340 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

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@jen9999:  I’m so sorry you’re struggling with this.  I know it’s not easy.  I remember the devestation of my first cycle, they told me they got 16 eggs and I was thrilled.  Then in the next sentence they told me only 4 were mature and fertilized.  They told me by day 2, only 2 had split and to plan on a day 3 transfer, then as I’m driving to the transfer (while missing a funeral event for my grandfather) they called and told me they all arrested and made no progess in the last 24 hours.  The 2nd and 3rd cycle with them, same thing, but they forced a crappy day 3 transfer which in hindsight I think they only did so they could bill me for a completed cycle.  They should have never transfered 2-4 celled day 3 embryos.  Personally, i think I got numb to bad news by then and had all but given up.  I remember in the beginning, I told myself when the IUIs didnt work that “Ill just do IVF then” thinking it was so easy too andn that it’d just work.  By then I’d lost faith in my clinic and was going to do 1 more hail mary cycle with another clinic, that was going to be my last just so i could tell myself i tried everything i could, which is when it all turned around.  My first round with my new clinic I got blasts for the first time and even a positive (although I ended up losing that one at 8w)….. but anyways, to cut this short. (I know, too late)…. If you have any doubts at all with what your clinic is suggesting, or even to just get a new set of eyes on your case, I highly recommend consults with other doctors.  Even if you don’t want to change clinics, maybe hearing if they’d do the same thing would give you confidnce going forward.  Or if they have new suggestions you’d like to try.  

Post # 446
Member
517 posts
Busy bee

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@pinkshoes:  I reallyIreally appreciate your advice. I had a few questions and sent  you a message. 

Post # 447
Member
1201 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

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@piscesinsc:  I got the ok to start my meds! Sorry it was hard for you to adjust to the estrogen. I am excited to finally be moving forward. I just hope members in mt household and myseld can stay healthy. I find myself stressing more about covid now then I ever did before! Hope you are adjusting better to the estrogen.  When is your next us? Mine is next thurs to check to see if they need to increase my dose or not. 

Post # 448
Member
1201 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

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@Cheekie0077:  Sending positive vibes both embryos are pgs normal!! Im sores about your mil nd acupuncturist.  People can be very insensitive espeoy people who have never been through this. Honestly we arent telling anyone we are doing this because of that reason! Our close family and friends know we did ivf and have one embryo…but I dont want the added stress of them knowing until after. If you have people who make you feel supportive thats is fine but anyone who is stressing you out… I think it makes sense to share less! Good luck!

Post # 449
Member
12340 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

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@Cheekie0077:  Fingers crossed for normal PGS results!  Major foot in mouth problems with your Mother-In-Law and acupuncurist, sorry you had to deal with their reactions.  I think a lot of people just have no freaking clue what to say.  But quality, not quanity!!  The two cycles I did PGS i only had 2 and 1 embryo, and they were all normal!  One of the two is my son now, and the other single 1 is the one I just got a positive from.

 

Post # 450
Member
788 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

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@candy08:  yay! I hear you about staying healthy. My husband is back in the office but he has told people that his wife is high risk and his colleagues have been really respectful and keeping their distance. I didn’t feel great today, though, and I immediately thought I had covid even though I know it’s not. My first ultrasound is Tuesday and then I go back next friday before my Monday transfer. 

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