(Closed) Infertility Thread, Part III

posted 9 years ago in Babies
Post # 452
Member
3363 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I actually do live in one of the states where it is required….but my husband’s company is based in NC, so we have NC based insurance, so that stuff wouldn’t be covered for me either.  When I started treatments, everything was 100% covered with my Massachusetts-based plan, but then we had to switch.  It is fustrating. But here in MA, I have the option to purchase Blue Cross of MA, for about 400 a month, but it would cover everything.  So if I need IVF or IUI, I would be all set.  So the obvious solution for you would be to move up here with me!!!!!!  We have an extra room!!!

Post # 453
Member
3866 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

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@Jenn23: thanks! πŸ™‚  I’m not gonna take the vitex this month, just for the heck of it.  Last month was kinda off-and-on with the vitex, so maybe I just needed that jump start?  guess we’ll find out, huh?

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@babybunny:  πŸ™ awwww, sorry to hear that!!!!  

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@Candy_Nee: well that just sucks!  my FI’s insurance covers infertility, but I haven’t read what all it does and doesn’t cover.  I do remember seeing something about IUI and IVF, but can’t remember the details.  What about independent insurance?  Maybe you can find something that will cover it more?  

At least you’ve got a game plan! πŸ™‚

 

 

Post # 454
Member
2226 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

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@heathaah:  Thanks!  I’ll be there this weekend!  πŸ™‚ That’s great that your BCBS covers that much!  It’s expensive, but in the long run, way better!  Especially b/c you could change it at open enrollment if you were to get pregnant before.  I wish mine offered that!  We both have Blue Cross, but clearly it’s not as good down here!

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@Zinzerena: After DH got laid off, we got him independent insurance, but it still only covers up to $5,000.  In my non professional opinion I would think that this would fall into that category – he’s infertile because he’s blocked.  Therefore, the underlying cause would be the blockage.  But, who knows!

Post # 455
Member
3866 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

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@Candy_Nee: UGH, that REALLY bites.  My Fiance keeps saying health care has become just another business… and, yeah, crap like this just proves it! (now, if they’d just give us refunds and discounts when the customer is pissed and unsatisfied with the service…)  

Well, maybe the office can write it the right way for it to be covered!  Here’s hoping it IS covered!!!!

Post # 456
Member
5496 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2010

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@babybunny: Aw, sorry! I’m sure you are so dissapointed. πŸ™ 

 

 

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@heathaah: Can I move up there, too?! PA doesn’t cover ferility issues. πŸ™  Luckily, Aetna does give us $5,000 towards IUI’s or IVF. But that’s just a one time use. And if we end up having to use it towards IUI’s and they don’t work, we’ll be pretty much down to zero (after 3-4 IUI’s) for IVF. Ugh. I’d rather skip the IUI’s and pay half for IVF, but insurance won’t let you do that. Ugh again. But that sounds great. $400 and unlimited coverage? WOW!!

 

 

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@Zinzerena: What is vitex? I don’t know what that is!

 

 

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@Candy_Nee: That’s horrible that they are saying that could be elective!! I hope you get good news and they say it is covered! If not, at least you can move on to IVF which has good success rates!!!

 

Post # 457
Member
3866 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

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@Jenn23: it’s an herb that’s supposed to help with fertility in women.  I had the PERFECT EGCM last month and I kept forgetting to take the vitex, lol.  So, maybe I don’t need it?  I figure what the heck.  If I don’t have any luck this month, I’ll go back to using it next month.  Then we’re gonna stop trying due to the wedding in April. We’ll start trying again (hopefully) in March.   

It’s disappointing, but at the same time, I wanna be able to wear my dress, lol.  My Fiance DID say, we can go to the dr. in July if I want to see if there’s any problems with him, but I really don’t wanna do that when we’re not going to be trying.  Ah, well.  

 

Post # 458
Member
4023 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

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@babybunny: I’m SO sorry πŸ™

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@Candy_Nee: Our insurance doesn’t cover ANYTHING infertility, so its 100% out of pocket. I agree with just doing IVF if your insurance won’t cover his surgery, which I think they should!

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@MissGreen: I think the email would be really nice!

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@heathaah: I am so jelous of your coverage!

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@heathaah: AND @MrsGreenGrass: GOOD LUCK IN YOUR TWW!!!!!! I will be joining you soon πŸ™‚

@MerryC: $25?! That is so unfair! They are like $50 here, but still worth it πŸ™‚

We went away for the weekend, and it was so nice and so needed! Back to reality today though πŸ™ Going in for my US at 2:30, then hopefully trigger shot! We had an interesting conversation this weekend on our drive though. If we do end up pregnant through IUI, then I got pregnant without having sex! My DH said that kind of bothers him, like its not “natural” and that is one reason he didn’t want to do it. What do you guys think?

Post # 459
Member
2226 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

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@Rosie Girl:  I think that’s a lot of the reason people don’t want to use the more “extreme” (for lack of a better word) infertility treatments.  But, the way my husband put it – yes, I’d like to get pregnant by having sex (who wouldn’t?!  LOL), but if that’s not in the cards for us, then we’ll get pregnant any way we need to. 

I guess it just comes down to what you’re (well, he’s) willing to do to get pregnant.  If the old fashioned way just isn’t in the cards, then you’ll have to take other measures.  Sure, it’s less than ideal but it could potentially be the only way.

Post # 460
Member
4023 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

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@Candy_Nee: We are there too. We would rather get pregnant “naturally”, but we will do anything we have to, seeing that we are doing IUI this month. It was just odd to think that we could get pregnant without having sex!

Post # 461
Member
1116 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

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@MissGreen: I think a note would be a good thing.  I reconnected with a friend from HS at a bachelorette party last summer, and we were both struggling with ttc.  It was only because she spoke up and said something about it that we were able to chat and support each other.  Def run it by your hubby, but the worst she could do is ignore it, right?

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@babybunny: Sorry! Still big progress though – O and AF on your own are a big deal!

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@Candy_Nee: Sorry for the new setback, that blows.  Hopefully insurance will cover something, and they will let you know very soon!  We have no coverage at all for IF, and if we have to do IVF, will probably try to do one of the Attain multi-cycle programs to keep cost in check.  As Ryna said, sometimes the docs office can code things in different ways to get coverage.

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@Rosie Girl: oh wow, $50 is crazy expensive for a pedi! but yes, still worth it πŸ™‚ Obviously, doing the IUI puts us in the category of being willing to take sex out of the equation, but it’s still the two of us joining to create a new life (hopefully!).  Yes, it’s clinical, but DH will still be there to hold my hand and give me a kiss while we go through IUI or IVF or whatever.  I think the whole IF process generates a different kind of intimacy – like “I will stand by you through thick and thin, and we face the world together even when it’s really hard” kind of thing – and we can still have regular “sexy time” intimacy the rest of the month!

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@Jenn23: 
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@Rosie Girl:  Hope both of your ultrasound appts go well today!

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@Zinzerena:  Glad you have the upside of being able to wear your pretty dress, regardless of what happens with ttc in the coming months.  I think it’s never a bad idea to get DH checked.  Fertility can change for both partners over time.

Post # 462
Member
1116 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

P.S. I recently read Scott Simon’s book, Baby, We Were Meant For Each Other: In Praise of Adoption.  He’s a long time NPR personality who adopted two little girls from China with his wife.  It’s really touching and funny, and made me feel like not getting pregnant traditionally and easily isn’t the end of the world.  It’s a quick read and I highly recommend it.

Post # 463
Member
4023 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

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@MerryC: I like how you put it. It is a different type of intimacy. I hadn’t really given it much thought until my DH said something about it either, and it just got me thinking. Its amazing the things that we can do today, and I am so thankful for it, otherwise, we may not be able to have a baby.

Post # 464
Member
5496 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2010

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@MerryC: Thanks, but mine isn’t until Thursday! 3 more days!

 

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@Rosie Girl: Good luck at your appt. today!! It doesn’t bother me hardly at all that we’d get pregnant without actually doing it the old fashioned way. What bothers me is the time this whole thing is taking, the money that will be involved for IUI’s or IVF, the pain from procedures, etc. The heartache of this all being so stressful and emotional is what hurts me. I would do IVF TODAY if it was free! lol But I can see why others would be upset by knowing you didn’t conceive the natural way. For me, though, it just doesn’t matter really. Anything to get pregnant…I hope the trigger shot goes well!!! Hope you have lots of good follies!

 

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@Zinzerena: Oh, i see. I’m not familiar with it. I’ll look it up on the internet. πŸ™‚ Sorry this wasn’t the month and you may have to take off a few months due to the wedding.  πŸ™  I see your wedding is right before my anniversary! I picked April because I don’t like the heat and was worried May and June would be way too hot for me. πŸ™‚

 

 

Post # 465
Member
682 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

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@Candy_Nee: That really sucks about the insurance. We have coverage but only up to $10,000 and I have no idea how quickly we will hit that.

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@Rosie Girl: I was having issues with that too, that we wouldn’t be having sex to conceive. But after IUI, some people have sex the next day too as a sort of “insurance”. So maybe do that and it will feel a little more natural?

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@heathaah: good luck! Hopefully the TWW goes by quickly!

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@MissGreen: I think reaching out would be great. I have been posting our struggles on facebook, just in case we have friends who are going through this or know someone going through it.

 

Post # 466
Member
4023 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I don’t think that not getting pregnant traditionally is bad. I just never knew my DH felt that way, and it made me start thinking about it differently. If we couldn’t get pregnant by any means, I would be 100% for adoption. It kind of surprised me that he was thinking/feeling that way about IUI. It hadn’t really crossed my mind!

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