Post # 1
We originally were planning for a big wedding and decided to go small instead. I am planning a very small wedding (30 people max)… when I look up ideas online I keep getting the word “informal” which kind of bugs me. Is anyone else planning a small wedding? Or had one? Care to share pics?
We’re planning to having the reception in a private room at a high scale restaurant with a bar included. The ceremony itself we plan to hold at some old ruins that we found on a stroll through the local interstate park… it’s actually right on the Hudson River and also has a NYC skyline view.
My concerns are:
– With my dress: I think I might feel silly in a big gown with my 28 guests, should I go tea-length or a non-fussy floor length gown?
-Invite list: I really want to keep it small and intimate, there’s a lot of friends and distant family who have already invited themselves and they’re not on our list.. how do I deal with that?
-Bridal party: How many or how little, is it okay to go without?
Post # 3
1) Whatever you want! (or so I believe) but if you think you would feel uncomfortable something with less poof in teh skirt or tea length would be nice.
2) Tell them you are sorry, but the size of youre venue is very limiting and you wont be able to invite them to the wedding If they say something to you only, but dont seek them out to tell them this if they have never mentioned it to you yet.
3)I would keep it to 1 Maid/Matron of Honor and maybe aBM if you want. If you want none, that is OK too
Post # 4
I only had a Maid/Matron of Honor and my husband had his Bridesmaid or Best Man and one of my brothers did a reading, the other 2 were ushers. So yeah, you don’t have to have a wedding party. You just need 2 witnesses to sign your marriage license. It’s your wedding-wear whatever you like!!! If you want to stick with a small intimate wedding-spread the word by mouth? If you are concerned about cost for a big wedding-there are many options to making it work-a backyard bbq, a cake and punch reception, a dessert reception, an appetizer and cocktail reception, some even choose a pot-luck. As far as the intimate wedding-it need not be informal. There is a Intimate Wedding site that may make you feel better, and help you decide on just what you want. Best Wishes.
Post # 5
Thanks! I think I might stick with the same detail as you did with the 1 Maid/Matron of Honor and Bridesmaid or Best Man. Could you please give me the link to the intimate wedding site you spoke about?
Post # 6
@lefeymw: I think the idea to not seek out the uninvited is a great way to not create a stir. About the dress… for some reason the tea length dress I’ve liked the most is actually quite poofy. It’s got a ballerina feel to it. I have a few months to go, I really need to pick it up at the gym. Lol.
Post # 7
My sister is having a very small wedding this summer, max there will only be 35 people. I think small weddings are awesome, and I can’t wait to go to her wedding! As far as your questions go, I think you should wear the dress you want, no matter the size of the wedding. It’s YOUR dress, so you should wear what you feel beautiful in. Also, have a bridal party if you want one; I think this is such a personal decision, and the size of your wedding shouldn’t matter in choosing whether or not to have a bridal party. It is absolutely fine to not have a bridal party (I didn’t have one), if that’s what you want.
As far as invitations go, I think discretion is your friend. If you are keeping the guest list small, mum’s the word. I’ve noticed (with my wedding and with the slew of weddings I’m attending this summer), if you talk about your plans and your wedding with people, they will expect to be invited. Keep quiet about it, and people either assume they’re not included/invited or a lot of people forget you’re getting married altogether.
Post # 8
Our guest list is 28 people. We are doing a dinner receptions at a cafe. We will have our own private area. To help people mingle and talk we are doing a buffet.
I’ve asked for apps to be displayed so people can talk while we are finishing up pictures.
We are not have a bridal party.
I’m wearing a wedding dress, it more modern but still a wedding dress.
As far as people thinking they are invited. Our response is “The wedding will be small and intitmate, as much as we would love everyone celebrate with us, we have decided to stay with that path. We are also paying for your own wedding and the budget is tight” I don’t apologize for not inviting anyone.
I’m a very personal person, I want to be me on my wedding day. If I had to share my wedding with a bunch of people, I would not be able to be me, I would stay very shy and quiet.
Post # 9
Sure, enjoy! here is the site:
Post # 10
I’d do a sheath dress. I don’t know how you feel about lace, but there are tons of beautiful semi-fitted dresses that would be gorgeous! 🙂
Just tell the friends/family that you’re having a VERY small ceremony (or even call it eloping!) with only your immediate families and wedding party.
Do whatever you want for the bridal party. Have none if you want (the non-guests above won’t know any better), just a Maid/Matron of Honor, or a few BMs. 🙂 You can have them wear whatever they want!
Post # 11
Thanks for all the advice ladies… I booked up the restaurant today and I have a list of 28 people. My mother (the beautiful woman funding all this) and I came up with the idea to invite more people to the ceremony (which will be outside) itself for friends and coworkers to attend.. and then just tell them that the dinner will be a small celebration for my family and with limited seating. That’s that!
So now to find a dress…
Post # 12
Do what you want. And look at Mrs. Rainbow’s recaps – she had a super-small wedding but it wasn’t “informal” by any means – she really went all out surrounded by only her nearest and dearest, which looked amazing to me.