(Closed) Insecurities… help!

posted 8 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
962 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I dont know how to tell you how to become more self-confident or less-insecure, but you may consider consulting a professional.  There is an author, Cheri Huber, who has very intuitive and easy to read books – you may want to go to your local book store and browse some of her titles.

Relationship wise, I feel I am on the other side of the fence – in your FH’s court, and you in my FH’s court.  I was a big partier and quit completely not long before meeting my FH.  He feels somewhat insecure about many aspects of the me-to-him ratio.  He feels I’m better looking, more intelligent, better travelled, more worldy, and so on.  I make an effort to pu-pu these comments and remind him often that I love him because he is not me.  That the last person I would want to spend the rest of my life with is a mirror of myself.  Therefore, he is exactly what I need and that is why I have decided to marry him and spend the rest of my life with him.  I find this often helps soothe his insecurities – besides, it’s all truth.

I think the fact that you are aware that these fights are beginning because of your insecurities but that you do honestly trust him is wonderful. I think your next step to take is with youself.  Find out how you can love you more and then these fights ought to cease on their own.

Good Luck!

Post # 4
Hostess
18644 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I would consider therapy.  It’s really hard to stop those destructive thoughts on your own.

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