(Closed) Insecurity and baggage

posted 4 years ago in Relationships
Post # 2
643 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

Anna113619:  You are your own worst enemy in this case. You ARE worth it, and he obviously sees that 🙂 I’ve gotten over my ex that used to put me down but what I did carry with me is the fear of being cheated on again and what helped me the most is just reminding myself that it’s not fair to make someone pay for someone else’s faults/insecurities. 

Post # 3
2375 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

He asked YOU out. Remember that, because that means he saw a lot of qualities in you that he finds attractive. He’s still dating you, which means the first date wasn’t a disaster. You’re having fun, which is how dating should be! And trust me, he gets gross morning breath, bed head, eye crusties, he gets smelly after a good workout, he likely snores when he’s sick and overall, puts one pants leg on at a time, just like the rest of us. And he knows you do too. 

Post # 4
1054 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

Anna113619: I haven’t been in this situation, but something you could try is doing the things that you would normally do after a break up. For example, working out really helps motivate me and increase my self confidence. Doing things on your own or with your girlfriends may help too. If your doubts are really getting in the way of your relationship with him (and yourself), you may want to consider seeing a counselor. Talking to someone can really help too. 

Post # 5
3025 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014 - Prague

Anna113619:  Don’t be so hard on yourself! After the crap your ex fed you, it’s going to take some time to feel really confident again.

Normally I’m a big advocate being single for awhile in this kind of situation. But there’s no reason to spoil something good, so I’d take the above advice. Do things that make you feel good: workout, spend time with friends or family, and put time and energy into any art or crafts that you enjoy. 

I would also consider very seriously the advice about seeing a counselor. What you’re dealing with is not the ordinary “Am I pretty? Am I worthy?” doubts most people experience; you’ve been emotionally abused by someone who you loved and trusted. That’s something to take seriously. 

Good luck, OP! I hope it works out with your new guy and that he treats you the way he should. 🙂

The topic ‘Insecurity and baggage’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors