Post # 1
- Wedding: June 2014 - Baby #2 due Sep 2017
Hello all! I’m British and my Fiance is Japanese. We’ve decided to live together for the rest of our lives in Japan, so having the wedding there is the obvious choice (plus I want to wear a kimono!). We are currently living in Vietnam where weddings can be very cheap so we were thinking of having a wedding party here for our friends in Vietnam (no family) as a ‘rehearsal’ (and the Vietnamese LOVE going to wedding parties!), marry in Japan, then perhaps have another party in the UK a few months later when we have time to go there for those who can’t make it to Japan.
Are we being greedy or is it just the natural consequence of an international couple? What do you think?
Post # 3
I think thats a great idea to have the parties with your families in each place. I watched a SYTTD ep where one girl wanted 3 diff dresses for 3 diff ceremonies! Now that is greedy!
But your idea is just like having a destination wedding and having the party afterwards. And if you have a lot of friends to have one in Vietnam too
Post # 4
@MrsYoshida: Nope, not at all! I think weddings can be very expensive to host, so to me it looks like you’re being very inclusive. I think it’s nice that you want to include as many of tyour friends and family as possible!
Post # 5
Another expat here:
I’d probably do a wedding in Japan, a party with frills in the UK so family there felt included. And I’d probably just do something like a cocktail party in Vietnam. I wouldn’t wear anything too fancy though, maybe a short white dress or something.
Post # 6
Ah, I’m glad someone else is in a similar situation! I’m Australian-Chinese and Fiance is Swiss. We live in Beijing but are soon moving to Singapore. We have family and friends pretty much all over the world! We have decided to do a destination wedding in Bali, and separate receptions in Switzerland and Melbourne. The Melbourne one will likely be small, because most of my close friends will be coming to Bali, but we need to do something as my grandpa won’t be able to travel overseas.
I would definitely do a wedding in Japan, and two receptions. The one in Vietnam sounds more like a fun party for your local friends, and those who can’t go to Japan. I really think multiple events are just a natural consequence of being an expat and international/interracial couple. Enjoy it, embrace it – and have fun with the different traditions and customs of each country!
Post # 7
@Mrs.LemonDrop: Another expat here.
I agree with all of this.
We had our wedding in Canada and a celebration where we live now. Everyone was happy and no one felt left out.
I think three weddings is way over the top.
Post # 8
That sounds like a great plan to me! Celebrate your wedding with as many friends/family as possible!
In my case, both Fiance and I were born and raised in the USA. However, his parents are from different countries in South America and his entire extended family remains there. Our plan is to have a big wedding/reception in the States and instead of a honeymoon we’ll travel to Lima, Peru and Santiago, Chile (with our wedding attire!) to celebrate with family members who cannot afford or are too physically infirm to fly to North America. So we, too, will have 3 wedding celebrations. Go for it!
Post # 9
It’s actually pretty normal in Japan to have a second reception (that the guests pay to attend) for the people who couldn’t come to the ceremony and first reception, and that’s without being international. So I think it’s totally fine to have multipe receptions.
Are you having a Japanese ceremony, a Western ceremony, or a mix of both?
Post # 10
I’d have all three celebrations, but maybe not wear the dress to all three (especially the Vietnam one if it’s before the wedding!)
Post # 11
Three weddings seems like a lot to me, but if you’re happy doing that- do it! :o) We had one in January in his country (where we live now), and will have one in July in my country (where we will live for the next several years, at least). I’m kind of overwhelmed by doing this twice… plan wisely :o)
Post # 12
same situation here.
intimate Destination Wedding wedding in the US, ILs threw a reception for their side of the family, my parents are throwing a reception for my side of the family.
Post # 13
It doesn’t sound greedy, rather as if you have many people that you care about and that you want to include in your happiness!
We’re getting married in Sweden, where I’m from, but will have a small, informal, reception once we’re back. For the second time around, it’s really just a party so that our friends here (that can’t make to Sweden) will feel included as well. The only real wedding elements will be a fancy wedding looking cake + the fact that I plan to wear my dress (so that the people here can see it as well – it’s a tea length dress, so it will work even for an informal affair).
Post # 14
We are techinically having 2 weddings. We will be having a traditional muslim ceremony here and family dinner then a wedding in Cuba with all our friends and a reception there. I dont think it is greedy its just sometimes what has to be done to incluse everyone you care about
Post # 15
- Wedding: June 2014 - Baby #2 due Sep 2017
Mrs.LemonDrop Thank you, I like the idea of not wearing the white dress for the party in Vietnam
peonyinparis I love your comment about embracing it and enjoying the customs of each country- thank you!
JabberwockyWe will be having the Shinto- style traditional ceremony, followed by the typical reception in a hotel 🙂
lanalnoco The wedding parties in Vietnam are pretty simple- the decoration/everything is already set so you just go, have the party, and leave, so that will definitely help the planning burden!
Hemnes Thank you for your input, sounds like a good plan 😀
Post # 16
@MrsYoshida: I think that you can have a party in both Vietnam and the UK to celebrate getting married, but three weddings is ridiculous.