(Closed) interesting message on DH's phone

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 2
258 posts
Helper bee

I would make inquiries.

Post # 3
94 posts
Worker bee

You need to talk about it. Don’t accuse him of anything!  Just say “look I saw these messages what are they about? “


Post # 4
6524 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

ChocolateLime:  i would be honest and ask about it. That sounds very fishy to me

Post # 5
983 posts
Busy bee

Definitely don’t make any accusations/assumptions but do talk to him about it. You weren’t snooping, just happenned to stumble on it so just be honest about it and ask. 

Post # 6
4690 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2013 - Upstate NY

I have to say no coworker would ever ask if a man has slept with his wife recently.

Post # 7
910 posts
Busy bee

lealorali:  agreed. You’d say ‘did you sort things out with your wife’ if there’d been a concerning conversation. I’d ne asking wth is going on.

Post # 8
55 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

ChocolateLime:  If I were in your situation I would most definitely bring up the fact that you saw it. Not saying anything wouldn’t even be an option for me, then again I at times find myself catastrophizing  situations, so I would go crazy not knowing. 

Post # 9
256 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

I’d be snooping thru his new phone!!

Post # 10
8439 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

lealorali:  +1, this.  OP, I’d definitely be asking some questions.

Post # 11
2515 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I’m so sorry.

Post # 13
579 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

ChocolateLime:  I am going to be the first admit that this is totally strange. I wouldn’t want to be jumping to conclusions so I won’t recommend it but yes it would make me supicious and perhaps worried. My dh changes his passwords quite often but I know all the usual ones so I still have access, I’d try ask for his new password and see what happens…

Post # 14
3307 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

It’s time to wake up and smell the coffee. There is no way these messages are about you. No.way. You’re not having sex with your dh. He has password protected his devices. Now this message. You can cling to denial or you can face facts. 

Post # 15
1283 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2017 - Baton Rouge, LA

ChocolateLime:  i just wanna say, your poise while dealing with this is remarkable. i’d probably be having a BSC moment lol Nothing will hurt a relationship more than poor communication. Talk to your man, he’ll probably help clear things up and you’ll feel better. Keeping you in my thoughts!

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