(Closed) Intimate Ceremony, larger reception. Invite help needed!!

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 17
1426 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

We did the same exact thing. Our ceremony was immediate family only + wedding party. We sent out invites to everyone to invite them to our wedding reception and didn’t mention anything about the ceremony in there. Our aunts/uncles/cousins weren’t invited to the ceremony since it was literally our wedding party + parents+ siblings and our officiant.

We got a lot of crap from DH’s aunts that were pissy that they weren’t invited to the ceremony but oh well… I looked it up and it’s like what the PP said… etiquette says you can invite more to the reception, but you can’t do it the other way around.

Post # 18
1238 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

we are also doing this, and it’s quite common. nothing to be bad about, in my opinion.

some of the earlier suggestions are good, I would just make the invitation clear that it’s for the evening reception, without any excuses in print. your family and friends will spread the word well enough to explains the whys…


Post # 19
853 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I’m doing a city hall reception on a weekday afternoon and then a reception the next day. Originally my thought was family only for the reception, but my fiance NEEDED 6 friends there (said they were like family). I gave in – after all, weddings are supposed to be for the two of you πŸ™‚  Then his PARENTS started inviting family friends to the ceremony – before invites even went out! I was furious – and still am – but gave in. His parents said they likely won’t attend anyway, since they’re from many states away, but I was still pissed.

It’s easy to draw the line at “the ceremony is for family only,” but once you start inviting some friends, feelings get hurt. That’s why I’m mad about his parents inviting friends.

The reception the next day is for our friends and family. No one so far seems to have a problem with this, aside from my fiance’s very traditional parents.

We’re sending out two separate invites: one is for wedding + reception, and the other is just for the reception. We found a seller on Etsy who makes a style we like and is fine with printing small quantities, and she isn’t charging us any more for making two styles of invites. 

Post # 22
2699 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

This is what most people in the UK do. We just send out 2 different types of invitation. One to the ceremony where guests know they’re there for the whole day and another invite to the reception with a venue and start time.

We’re having the exact same numbers to each as you!

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