(Closed) Invitation changed 5 times

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
4521 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

You are not being silly; your friend is being rude. “Friend,” I should say, because the way she’s treating you isn’t friend-like at all. Sadly, your BF is right — you guys are just being used as back-up seat-fillers.

I’d say this: “We’ve decided not to attend the wedding since the invitation keeps changing. It’s too hard for us to make our plans. I really enjoyed the hen do and hope the wedding is lovely.”

Post # 4
451 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

Oh hell no, I would not go. You are being way too kind and generous with your time and understanding. They are being rude and inconsiderate and it is CLEAR you are just an extra invite to get a gift. No way in hell would I be going after all that. I’m sooo sorry they even put you in that position. It is not you, it is their bad etiquette and rudeness!

I too would say like Stillme said!! 

Post # 5
2273 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

Bluesmartieeater:  Tiered weddings are incredibly rude! Even if there was no back and forth, the fact that you were only invited after dinner is so disrespectful. I think you might have dodged a bullet!

Post # 6
2972 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Wynn Las Vegas

Wow, how rude!! I wouldn’t go. What Stillme said would be a polite way to bail.

Post # 7
1247 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014 - San Francisco, CA

Geez. How rude! Just send a card and skip the whole thing. Even if tiered weddings are acceptable in your social circle, this whole “Now you can, now you can’t” attitude is INSANE.

Post # 8
183 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

I would text your “friend” back and graciously advise her that you will not be attending any part of the wedding and that you wish her nothing but the best in her future. And if you wish, send her daughter a card, and then never speak to the mother again. That is so rude for her to go back and forth. 

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