- 5 years ago
Apologies for this random post, but I don’t know what to do with an issue which has arisen in regard to a situation with a friend’s daughter’s wedding.
An an ex colleague of mine invited myself and my boyfriend to the evening do of her daughter’s wedding, which is due to take place soon, last year, when the couple first got engaged. We accepted the invite, and about a month later, we were asked if we would like to attend the whole thing, as some people had not replied on time and there were now some free spaces for the meal. We said yes, and thought no more of it.
A few months later, I left my job and texted my colleague asking what colour the bridesmaid dresses were so I did not wear a clashing colour. She texted me back saying she was very sorry, but relatives she thought would not be coming to the wedding were now coming and that she could not say no, did my boyfriend and I mind going to the church, and having a few hours doing nothing, then come to the evening do. I replied that, because the wedding was over an hour’s drive away for us, we would just come to the evening, as otherwise, we would be hanging around with nothing to do.
Then, a few weeks ago, some people dropped out, and we were again told we could come to the whole thing. We agreed and said we would be delighted to go.
The bride’s hen party has just gone, and I attended that. I am not a very confident person and tend to blend into the background in situations like that, so I tend to be one of the quieter ones in the group. In addition, I was not well that day and had a pulled muscle in my back, which was causing me severe pain, both of which the other hens were aware of.
Anyway, to cut a long story short, the bride’ smother has today texted me saying that it was clear I had not enjoyed the hen do (I did) and that she did not feel that my boyfriend and I should be under any obligation to come to the wedding, and we could just come to the evening, as they had other people waiting who really wanted to go! She was quite rude and I am really hurt and upset that they have-yet again-changed their minds. I feel a bit like we are just reserves to fill the spaces if there are no other options. But am I being silly feeling like this? my boyfriend is furious and does not want to go at all now, and I just don’t know what to do. I was really looking forward to the wedding, but I am so worried now that we are not really wanted there at all. Any advise on how I should respond to this or if I am being silly would be greatly recieved! Thank you.