(Closed) Invitation confusion

posted 4 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
2134 posts
Buzzing bee

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retrometro:  I would wait til you get the invite. Maybe she was rushed. I wouldn’t read into it until the invite comes..

Post # 3
8940 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

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retrometro:  I wouldn’t worry about it yet. Save-The-Date Cards aren’t required, and even when people send them, they don’t necessarily send them to everyone. If you have to buy plane tickets or make other travel arrangements that make it important for you to be sure now, I’d ask about it. But if it’s a local wedding, I would just assume he’ll be included when the invitation shows up and not worry about it until then.

Post # 4
586 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

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retrometro:  I would also recommend waiting to see what the invite says – she may have just wanted to get the date on people’s calendars and not realized that the way they were addressed might be confusing. Like others said, if you need to make travel arrangements before the invites come out, then I would touch base with her about it, but if not then I would wait for the invite.

When we sent out Save the Dates, we sent one to a couple of friends who are roomates – they will each get a plus one for the actual wedding (and get their own invite) but for the STD we just wanted to get it on their refrigerator. Reading this, I’m now wondering if they will also be confused, haha. Fortunately, neither of them are in relationships and they are local, but I may casually say something to them the next time I see them just alerting that they will be able to bring a date if they want :).

Post # 5
13889 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I’d wait too — is there any chance she didn’t know your FI’s full name?  Or that you don’t live together?  There could be a bunch of reasons why he wasn’t on the STD.  I’m sure it was an oversight and it’ll be rectified once the invitations come out!

Post # 6
330 posts
Helper bee

Fiance received a save the date a few months ago addressed only to him from his college roommate. Fiance was still living with this guy when we started dating 7 years ago, so it’s not like he doesn’t know who I am so I was a bit put off.

I guess I’ll find out in a few months if I’m invited? 🤔

Post # 7
3611 posts
Sugar bee

Even if she didn’t know your DH’s name, she could have asked (or, less awkwardly, just have done some social media stalking). This is weird and I’d be nonplussed too. I don’t think it’s appropriate to invite you without your Darling Husband under any circumstances, even if she has never met him before.

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