(Closed) Invitation Conundrum Poll

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Should I include his parent's names or not?
    Yes, include them : (20 votes)
    54 %
    No, it's not necessary : (10 votes)
    27 %
    Not only is it not necessary, it might get confusing to people : (7 votes)
    19 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    1548 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    Are your parents paying? If so, I would ask them how they feel since they are the hosts. If they are ok with it, go for it!

    Post # 4
    Member
    2718 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    What we did, and DH’s parents did not pay for anything, it was primarily my parents/grandparents who paid, is below. I personally thought it was fair. DH’s parents were supporting us in other ways (we moved into their house after the wedding). I did put a thank you in the acknowledgment section of my programs.

     

    Bride’s Parents

    request the honor of your presence

    at the marriage of their daughter,

    Bride’s name

    to

    Groom’s name

    son of Groom’s parents

    on date

    at time

    at place

    Post # 5
    Member
    595 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2012

    Have you asked your parents how they feel about it? I think if they are fine with it you can ask Fiance parents how they feel about it. If everyone likes the idea then I would go ahead with including both sets of parents on the invitation?

    How does your Fiance feel about it?

    Post # 6
    Member
    4518 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    If your parents are paying for the event, then they’re the hosts and it should be their names on the invitation.

    The fact that your FI’s parents are paying for your honeymoon is awesome, but that has nothing to do with the actual wedding event.

    It’s nice for guests to know who the hosts are so that they can thank people properly, or let the hosts know about any special accommodations they might need.

    Post # 7
    Member
    2425 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    @pmerr:  I second this approach, this way they are honored but it’s clear who is hosting, i.e. paying.

    Post # 8
    Member
    248 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    Neither one of our parents are paying for the wedding, but we wanted both sets on the invite, so we included them. I say go for it! Maybe check with your parents first since they are actually paying though.

    Post # 9
    Member
    11747 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    If your parents are paying and his aren’t you can still include them.  You write:  Mr. and Mrs. Your Parents invite you to the marriage of their daughter First Name Middle Name to Groom First Name Middle Name Last Name, son of Mr and Mrs His parents…

    Post # 12
    Member
    90 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I had this exact same problem. I talked to Future Mother-In-Law about it, and she was more comfortable with this wording:

     

    Mr. and Mrs. B

    request the honor of your presence at the marriage of their daughter

    Ruby Ann

    to

    Mark (full name)

    son of Mr. and Mrs. M

     

    She was more comfortable with that wording.  Let us know what you decide!

    Post # 13
    Member
    2425 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    @Rockcandy:  she sounds like she is thinking most of the guests on their side will know he is there son, but will all of your family? I know with my wedding, even though pretty much everyone had met my husband, but not all of my extended family had met his parents! If she doesn’t object to it, I would either do the “son of XXX” option or just not mention them if you want to be traditional. On my invitation my parents wanted it as traditional as possible, so only their names are listed. DH’s parents were listed on the programs, etc.

    Post # 14
    Member
    2718 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    @Rockcandy:  Unfortunately, you can do what you want, but you also need to balance what the wishes of the other people are (but only to an extent). If it seems like FI’s parent’s don’t want to be included, then don’t, especially if your parents sound like they want it to be just them. You still have to keep other people happy if they are (helping) pay for things. I guess you just have to do what makes everyone most happy. It’s the first thing of the wedding that everyone (guests) see.

    Post # 15
    Member
    3194 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    @pmerr:  +1 that’s what we did!

    Post # 16
    Member
    3783 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    We are doing: “the Velazquez and Fredrickson families invite you to share in the joy of the marriage of their children X and X on (date)… Yadda yadda

    The topic ‘Invitation Conundrum Poll’ is closed to new replies.

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