Post # 1
I still have a while until I need to order my invitations (wedding in May), but I’ve been struggling with an idea for a little while. My wedding will be in North Carolina, about a 10 hour drive for most family who live in Florida. I don’t know about you, but I feel a slight tinge of obligation whenever I receive a wedding invitation from a friend or family, almost like I’m thinking ” if they took the time and thought to invite me, I should probably go”. I’ve been considering putting some sort of note on the invitation stating something along the lines of “please don’t feel obligated,” as the location is so inconvenient. Do you think this is tacky, or a polite message for those who can’t afford the time away or travel costs? If you think it’s a good idea, do you have any suggestions on the wording?
Post # 3
There isn’t a poll to vote, however, yes I do think its bad if you write “Do not feel oblidated” or something along those lines. Most people feel special when invited to a wedding and adding a word such as that would take that feeling away.
Imagine yourself receiving an invite like this … what would you think? Being that its so far, would you still feel as obligated to go?
I know if I received this (being that I live in FL lol) and I know I wouldn’t make it – I’d send a nice card back with the RSVP just stating so. I would assume that the bride/groom realize the distance and don’t have high expectations for the ENTIRE GUESTLIST to attend. So, my feeling of obligation wouldn’t feel so high.
IMO – hope it helps!
Post # 4
I wouldn’t put anything like that. It kind of sounds like an apology and you shouldn’t have to apologize for where you decided to get married.
Post # 5
Could you maybe get that sentiment out via word of mouth? I mean chat up some of your family and express that you know it’s quite a distance, etc.
Post # 6
I wouldn’t write anything on the invitation. I think it would look a little odd, and (like the PP said), you don’t need to apologize for your wedding location. What you might do, however, is spread the word through your family that you certainly don’t expect people to travel that far for your wedding, so if anyone can’t make it, there are no hard feelings.
Post # 7
Don’t write anything. i would venture to say most people don’t feel that tinge about wedding (gasp even family weddings).
Post # 8
I wouldn’t write anything. If I saw that i would think you’re trying to say you don’t want me to come.
Post # 9
I wouldn’t worry about it. If people really don’t want to travel that far, they won’t. And if your wedding is important enough to them, it won’t feel like an obligation. Does that make sense?
Post # 10
All of that makes perfect sense, and now I completely agree! Sometimes it can be so hard to see things from the outside, which is why I love this website so much. 🙂 Thanks so much for your opinions!!
Post # 11
I wouldn’t write anything like that either. You are getting married in a location that is not perfectly close for everyone, but you shouldn’t apologize for that. You send the invite to show you would love to have them there, but after that, it is their decision as to whether they can attend or not. I personally think that having your wedding away from where most of your guests live indicates that you do not expect everyone to go out of their way to attend anyways. I wouldn’t worry about it too much, but you can always mention it to anyone who talks to you about it, so they know you understand not everyone will be able to make the trip.
Post # 12
Personally I would not put anything in about not feeling obligated to go. If people are not able to come and would still like to be there I am sure they will let you know the situation. If you really feel that you should let people know about it, I would simply call them after the invitations are sent out and let them know that you know the location is kind of inconvienent and that you will understand if they are not able to make it.