(Closed) Invitation drama: Should I put their names on the invitations??

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: See below and vote
    Leave it the way it is : (23 votes)
    92 %
    Change it : (2 votes)
    8 %
  • Post # 3
    3625 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I would just leave it. If she is really concerned that they won’t know who is inviting them to the wedding, then she can tell them verbally (e.g. “Hi Jane and John! Just wanted to give you a head’s up that my son Joe is getting married! We sent you an invitation and hope you can make it!”).

    I also think that people should know the couple if they are attending a wedding. However, I understand social obligations, so I can see where she is coming from, sort of.

    Post # 5
    145 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: December 2012

    If you leave their names off then maybe these extra people she invited really won’t know who the wedding is for and will RSVP “no” 🙂 Could help with the “extra guests who don’t even know FI” problem!

    Really though, I would definitely leave them off. My parents helped as much as they could with our wedding and his family didn’t help at all so I obviously didn’t think his parents needed to be listed and I knew my parents wouldn’t care either way. Ultimately, it’s up to you. Your Future Mother-In-Law shouldn’t be telling you how to plan your wedding.

    Post # 6
    6741 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2014

    @ebberz0225:  I would just tell her that it’s tradition to put the names of the people who are hosting the event and since they’re not hosting the event, you didn’t think it was right to put their names on it, in addition to the fact that you don’t want anyone’s names on it because you don’t like how it looks, so even though your own parents are hosting the event, their names aren’t even on it.  I would use the terms “hosting” as opposed to “paying”… Good luck dealing with that one! 

    Post # 8
    3039 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I think you should go with the invitation as is. It would have been more of an issue if they had paid for the entire wedding. However, as that’s not the case I think you should explain that you prefer the more informal wording. If she persists, tell her that you would be delighted if she could help you to follow up with the people that don’t respond.

    Post # 10
    3039 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    @ebberz0225: Glad I could help and good luck! Family can have unrealistic expectations when it comes to weddings, so you’ll have to hold your ground! 

    Post # 11
    163 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    Leave it as is. It is your wedding not hers. I would say already printed too late.

    Post # 12
    1341 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    Unless they are paying for the wedding, they are not really included on the invite. The names on the invite show who’s hosting. If she’s paying though, she does get a say.

    Post # 13
    101 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @ebberz0225: I think you should leave it…. For instance in my situation, my FI’s parents are divorces and his step-mom would be upset if her name wasn’t on there… and technically my Fiance was raised by his grandparents anyways….so I didn’t include any parent’s names at all…It’s both yours and your FI’s day!!! No one else’s…and if those guests don’t recognize your names…then they are not part of your life anyways… just my opinion 

    So I worded it like this;


    Because you have shared in
    our lives by your friendship and love, we
    together with our parents
    invite you to share
    the beginning of our new life together when we exchange marriage vows
    on Saturday, the eighth of June
    two thousand thirteen at two o’clock
    St.                 Church

    Followed by a Reception
    at six o’ clock in the evening

    Le                    Banquet Hall  

    The topic ‘Invitation drama: Should I put their names on the invitations??’ is closed to new replies.

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