(Closed) Invitation Etiquette Issue, Please Help!

posted 3 years ago in Paper
  • poll: Which wording should I use?
    My original wording : (4 votes)
    22 %
    My MIL's preference : (14 votes)
    78 %
  • Post # 16
    3807 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2017

    I’m with your Mother-In-Law. No one should be called ‘Mrs HusbandFirst HusbandLast’. Many people find it quite offensive and erasing. 

    You could always ask your parents if they would be upset with ‘together with their families’. They might be totally cool with it and you can skip that names altogether! OR if you really wa nt to keep it as is, just replace an ‘and’ with ‘&’. No one will think twice about it. 

    Post # 17
    139 posts
    Blushing bee

    I can see where your Mother-In-Law is coming from – despite the disparity in funding, your mother has been granted her own name and she is simply Mrs wife-of-husband. That’s quite degrading.

    I went for ‘Together with their parents’ to get around this nightmare, but if you feel this will cause offense and you also don’t want to/can’t addresss it just from your parents then you have no choice to go with all of the ‘and’s &’s +’s’ type scenarios.

    Post # 18
    126 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: May 2017

    I was pressured into doing the second…where I listed both of their names (Mr. and Mrs. Bride’s fathers name, and Mr and Mrs Groom’s mom and step-dad’s name), but it still feels weird to me, because the way I was asked to word it, it sounds like his step-father IS his father. My DH’s dad isn’t very involved in his life, and wasn’t invited to our wedding, but I had to list it like his dad doesn’t exist. I’m still not comfortable with it but his mother insisted… hopefully not many people noticed. Also it felt weird that my mom was not listed, but his mom was, and they didn’t pay for the wedding at all and shouldn’t have even had their names on the invites. Apparently this is still a sore subject with me! Lol

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