(Closed) Invitation Etiquette (wording and more…)

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 4
1776 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

If all sets of parents are contributing, I would definitely include them all on the invitation.  

Post # 5
518 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I agree, if parents are contributing to the wedding, they should be on the invitation.

Post # 6
5095 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

All 3 sets of our parents are paying! We worded it like this:

mom and stepdad

dad and stepmom


Father-In-Law and Mother-In-Law

request the pleasure of your company

at the marriage of their children



mr. wombat

etc. I don’t think it’s awkward – it’s just one (or two) extra line(s) to list all the parents.

As to the rest of your question – I completely agree that it’s awful to invite people just for the gifts. I know your dad means well and just wants the best for you, but I think you need to put the kibosh on this.  Use the venue space as an excuse, if necessary.

Edit: also, announcements used to be quite common. They were typically sent out after the wedding had taken place.  I don’t know what the current etiquette is on them.

Post # 8
19 posts

I definitely agree that all parents should be on the invite… it’s actually very common nowadays. And you should of course talk to your dad and tell him how you feel about inviting people just for gifts! Just explain that you really don’t feel comfortable with the idea and a few extra gifts really isn’t a big deal. Besides, what if these people decide to come – and you said you can’t fit them! As for the announcements, I’m really not sure – sorry! But if you’re sending out invitations what’s the point of the announcement?

Post # 9
1676 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Issue #1: Well, I think that you”re right on this issue. You can have some overage in the number of people that you invite, because at least a few people will decline, but to invite many people “knowing” that they wont come – you can’t guarantee that. So be very careful about inviting too many people in case people “you know won”t come” do show up – it has happened!

Issue #2 – Wedding announcements are quite common. You can send them to anyone, and they simply announce the marriage. They’re often used when people have very small weddings or elope and usually include a picture. 

Issue #3 – We have the exact same situation. We worded the invites:

Mama Pepper & Stepdaddy Pepper (paying 1/2)
Papa Pepper & Stepmomma Pepper (paying 1/4)
request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their daughter
Red Pepper Gal


Red Pepper Boy

son of 
Mr. & Mrs. Peppers-in-Law (paying 1/4)

Its a little long and a little wordy, but our parents would be hurt if not everyone was on there, and they ARE paying, so we sucked it up and used a reception card. 


Hope that helps!

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