(Closed) invitation question- please be honest

posted 6 years ago in Paper
Post # 3
Member
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

In this case I would say you dont need to invite their spouses, since their spouses dont know you and the 5 co workers can sit one table at the wedding.

Post # 4
Member
2416 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Personally, I think it’s rude to invite someone without their SO if you know they have one. I would invite all the couples and invite the single without a date.

 

Post # 5
Member
1572 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

Rude.

Post # 6
Member
902 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

If you know their husbands, I think it would be rude NOT to invite them.  But considering they’re co-workers I agree with bells they all could sit a table together 🙂

 

Post # 7
Member
7902 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

It is rude to not invite spouses. I would not worry about the single person being single while the rest have their spouses invited.

Post # 8
Member
264 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I’ve invited 3 former co-workers. I don’t know their SOs, so I was just going to invite them – no guest. I would feel weird including someone I don’t know. I don’t feel bad about it because they at least know each other.

Post # 9
Member
674 posts
Busy bee

Rude. They aren’t just dating, they are married. I can understand not giving the single colleague a random plus one, but for the married folks, invite the spouses.

Post # 10
Member
1627 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

Since you are only inviting 5 coworkers and assuming their spouses don’t know you, I would say it would be fine to only invite the coworkers.  But I would explain to them why you “can’t” invite their spouses so they are aware, before you send the invitation.  I would just say you’re really tight on the guest list, but hope they can attend but just don’t have room for a ton of extras.  The married ones, especially, should understand how hard it is to get down to a good guest count number.

I wouldn’t recommend inviting the 4 spouses and then asking the single come alone.  That person may feel like a 3rd wheel and I think it would be uncomfortable for the whole group (no one wants to leave the single sitting by themself).  It seems like sometimes when someone’s single, they already feel a little uncomfortable because of that , so making them come along when the “couples” get to bring a date may really discourage them from coming.

Post # 11
Member
7902 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

@bubbly234:  If you have a big enough guest list that you are inviting former or current co-workers, I’d imagine the average person is inviting other people they don’t personally know yet. I didn’t know any of my in-laws friends they had us invite and I didn’t even know some of the ones my own parents had me invite (their best friends from college, for example). My husband and I both hadn’t met some of the long-term SOs of some of our guests. I can’t imagine unless your wedding is very small that both bride and groom will actually already know every person invited.

To get back to OP, as I and others have said, it’s rude not to invite spouses or those in long-term committed relationships. How would you feel if your husband (imagine wedding has passed) were invited to a wedding without you? If that happened to me, I would think it was an error and the couple didn’t realize he was married.

Post # 12
Member
996 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@unique5109:  idk….it is kind of rude…if you know your coworkers well enough to invite them to your wedding then not extending the invitation to their spouses is a snub

If you don’t feel you know them well enough to invite their spouses then why invite them anyway?

I say either invite with spouses or don’t invite at all

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