Post # 1
I’m kind of stumped on invitation wording etiquette. The groom and I are paying for 99% of the wedding. I didn’t know about any of the wording rules until just a week ago. I can’t seem to figure out the wording since my fiance and I are the hosts. My parents are divorced and my dad is remarried and don’t talk. His mother passed away a few years ago and his dad is remarried. I feel like it would be almost mean to not include the parent names. Plus I don’t want them to feel put down infront of the guests since it’s obvious they’re not financially contributing if it’s only mine and his name. What are yalls thoughts? I’ve come up with this wording.. My wedding is taking place outside of a 1900s circa home and not in a church. Is honor of your presence too formal? How about pleasure of your company is requested at the marriage of? You guys are amazing! Thank you!
The honor of your presence is requested at the marriage of
my name here
daughter of mr. dad and ms. mom (my parents are divorced)
son of mr. dad and the late mrs mom (his mother passed away a few yrs ago)
Do you guys think my wording goes? Without giving away who’s paying.. Neither of our parents are in the financial spot to pay for the wedding so I don’t want to just throw them out of the invitation. 🙂 I still want everyone to feel included and special.
Post # 2
- Wedding: June 2014 - San Francisco, CA
I’ve seen plenty of invitations that say something along the lines of,
Tkala and Johnny
along with their families
request the pleasure of your company
at their celebration of matrimony
June 18, 2015
(All specifics made up, obviously.)
There’s no hard-and-fast rule saying you HAVE to include everyone’s name, or indeed anyone’s name, in the invitation. It’s based on personal preference, not necessarily who is paying (especially since for most weddings in the US today, the couple pays, not the families.) You can always just go with something vague like the above, then spell it all out with as much detail as you wish in the wedding program.
Post # 3
Just a note, honor indicates a church wedding or religious ceremony. Pleasure of your company, or requests your presence indicates a civil non-religous ceremony. Hope that helps!
Post # 4
tkala: PPs are correct. I also wanted to add that no one will infer anything about your families’ finances from the wording of the invitation. The host of a party issues the invitation, and hosting does not necessarily imply “paying.”
Post # 5
Together with their families
request the pleasure of your company
at the celebration of their marriage
Saturday, the first of June<br />
two thousand and fourteen
at six o’clock in the evening
Anyhwere, Any State
I prefer this format because I find it more visually pleasing when the bride and groom’s names are in larger text and the focal point in the middle.
Post # 6
We paid for all of our wedding and used the together with their families wording.
Post # 7
- Wedding: July 2014 - Willow Ridge Manor - Morrison Colorado
I second the “Together with their families” wording- that is what we wanted to do but my parents threw a fit so we had to put them on it even though we were paying for at least half.
Post # 8
I was admant that I wanted no mention of our parents on our invites. They said:
For everything there is a season
a time and a purpose
Becuase you have shared in their lives
through your friendship and love
we now invite you to share an experience
a joyous occasion
The marriage of
I feel like if you put the “together with their families” your kind of implying that they helped pay/host as well.. But thats up to you… Nothing is wrong when it comes to this stuff in my opinion. Its all based on what you and your Fiance want!
Post # 9
As other PPs have mentioned, “honour of your presence” is used for weddings held in a religious space (church, etc.)
Because your wedding is taking place outside, “request the pleasure of your company” is appropriate.
Also, I agree with other PPs about “together with their families.”
Remember that financial contributions do not determine who is named on an invitation and who is not!
Post # 10
ours will say
“because they think you are wonderful
bride & groom
would like you to celebrate & dance
as they embark on the adventure of marriage”
Post # 11
Hosting honors are nothing to do with the financial end or who is paying for what. If you want to list the parents’ names, that is fine. “Together with their families” is also correct. I like the idea of honoring all the parents by name as that can be interpreted as recognizing them for a lifetime of support, not just a day. Of course, there are situations where “together with their families” is very practical.
Honor or honour of your presence is usually used when the ceremony is a religious one. It doesn’t have to be in a church, though. The latter spelling is used frequently on formal invitations, even in the US.
I do tend to prefer the traditional, understated wording to anything that implies that the love and “uniqueness” of one wedding exceeds any another.
Post # 12
Commenting to follow because this is really helpful!
Post # 13
merpitymerp: I completely disagree with this.
I think that based on tradition, people will infer that the “host” is paying. I’m not sure what else “hosting” an event means if not paying… but regardless, I do think that often has an inpact on the wording.
Post # 14
- Wedding: December 2014 - Loft
tkala: All of your options are appropriate. We’re paying for our wedding adn ours said ” Your presence is requested at the union of C zelda and J Dell
Post # 15
Ours said ” The honor of your presence is requested at the wedding of Bride to Groom…blah blah etc”. We are getting married at a bed and breakfast. I just like the wording. I would be honored if you all would be there,simple as that.
I did not put any mention of either of our parents bc 1. We’re paying ( I have always thought if you’re old enough to get married,you should be financially stable and have a wedding you can afford. But that’s my opinion.) And 2. It sounds old fashioned,like an arranged marriage Lol. I imagine the bride parents pushing her out the door and off to marry a man she’s never met.lol. agaon,that’s me lol