(Closed) Invitation wording. How does this sound?

posted 5 years ago in Paper
Post # 3
Member
6212 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House

If you’re going to go with “the thirteenth of April,” I think you should say “at twelve o’clock” or “at twelve o’clock in the afternoon”

I’m not a huge fan of the forever stuff, but to each his own. I wouldn’t make fun of it if I got it in the mail.

Post # 5
Member
273 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I think that you should take out the “we” in the second line.  So it would read more like:

We’ve decided on forever
and forever begins when
Becca Blank
and
Matt Blank
get married
on Saturday, the thirteenth of April

Post # 6
Member
6212 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House

I think that what I don’t like is the repetition of forever. How about changing it to actually be an invitation, like “we’ve decided on forever, and we’d like you to be there when we, …” or “You are invited to be there when we, Miss and Mr, say I do”  or something like that?

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