Post # 1
So I have read and seen a lot of ways to do wording – please give me your suggestions based on our situation. Fiance wants to do more than just “Together with their families/parents x and y….” AND I do kind of agree, some people we are inviting know his parents or my dad/mom, etc
- his parents are paying for the reception
- we are paying for everything else
- my father gaves us money too
- we are in our mid 30s (first marriage)
- my mom is deceased
The invitaiton style I chose via Vista Print has my fiance and our names listed first…can’t move this because of the design and the “&” that’s all flowy
Can you please let me know if I’m doing this correct?
Jane Ann Doe
John Michael Smith
invite you to celebrate
together with their parents
Mr. Eugene and the late Mrs. Kathy Doe &
Mr. James and Mrs. Eileen Smith
Post # 2
So, I think the wording you have is fine for your situation, although I would check with an online source regarding how couples are listed when one spouse is deceased–Cranes is a good resource and Martha Stewart’s site probably has something on that.
Technically, the invite shows guests who is hosting (paying for) the event–it’s not the place to “honor” your family members by listing them directly. Since you and your FI’s parents and your father have all contributed, I don’t see a problem in listing you all as “hosts” in the way you have it (although another more etiquette-oriented bee might set me straight!)
The one line that I do think you should think about is “invite you to celebrate.” For one, you’re inviting people to witness your nuptials, not celebrate them (that’s the reception afterwards)–it is, ultimately, a ceremony that you’re inviting guests to first and foremost. Second, if your wedding is in a church, then the proper wording is “honor of your presence is requested” because God does not invite people to “celebrate” with Him and we’re not God’s “company” in His house…I’m not a religious person myself; I’m just explaining why the wording is expected to be different when it comes to weddings in houses of worship.
Post # 3
Condolences on the loss of your mother. Of course you want to honor her, but the invitation is not an appropriate place for that. Invitations are functional — they serve a purpose. They tell people who is hosting, what, and when. Your situation is a bit complicated since it sounds like everyone has had a hand. In this case, I would phrase it something like,
You are cordially invited
to celebrate the marriage of
Daughter of Bob Doe and the late Carol Doe
Son of Ted and Alice Smith
[rest of the details]
This doesn’t actually pinpoint the hosts, which is ok in your case since it’s a group effort. But it does let everyone know exactly whose wedding it is, which is the main point. You love your mom and she will be there in spirit, but it’s kind of awkward to invite people to “celebrate with” a deceased person. The “daughter of” wording is more accurate and acceptable. Best wishes!
ETA: I just reread and see that you can’t change you and your fiance’s names being first. Can you still add Daughter of and Son of under your names? If not, I would choose a different invitation. Or see if someone else here can come up with something appropriate, because I can’t.