Post # 1
Hello! So I am a new poster & I have been unable to find an answer to this question even though some form of it has been asked many times! I am getting married in August & my parents will be paying for pretty much everything in the wedding except for the photos & invitations which I will be paying for mainly out of convenience. The wedding will be pretty laid back, & the invitation currently reads, Together with their families, Jane Doe & John Smith invite you to their wedding, which my parents are cool with. However, we are in the process of making rehearsal dinner invitations with my Future In-Laws listed as the hosts (they are paying for it), so I worry that I need to give some credit to my parents on the wedding invite. The things that keep me from just slapping them at the top are the following
- My parents are in the middle of a divorce, so even though they would still technically be Mr. & Mrs. Doe on the invite, it would be odd to put them together on the invite. & even odder to put them as Mr. Doe & Mrs. Doe
- The wedding will be laid back/casual & I feel like adding the parents at the top will be too formal. Plus I’m almost 30 and feel like I’m too old to be referred to as anyone’s daughter on the invite
Can you think of any other ways to give them some credit? Is their a version of Together with their families that only includes the bride’s family? I appreciate any insight you can provide…thank you!!
Post # 2
You don’t need to give any credit. Due to their complicated marriage situation, and you already printing out the invitations… Don’t worry about it. At the end of the day, they’re just invitations, and no one will be reading them that closely. All I look for on the invitation is the location and the time.
Post # 3
mah84: I would go with together with their parents.
Post # 4
Together with their parents or familes and not list any names
Post # 5
We issued my daughters’ invitations in the hosts names (parents of the bride). We have two separate names (I never changed my last name) and they fit on one line. The POGs issued the rehearsal dinner invitations, in their own names. In one wedding, my SIL opted out of putting “son of XXX and YYY”” below his name on the invitation, and in the other wedding, they couldn’t fit-in another line.
I’d suggest you ask your parents what they would prefer.
Post # 6
I would ask them what they want. If they are nice enough to pay AND going through stress of divorce AND you put ILs name on Rehearsal Dinner invites, it adds up to me that you are not being thoughtful. If you feel like you are too old to be referred to as their daugther, you shouldnt take their money.
Post # 7
Thanks for all of your feedback!! I will be seeing both of them this weekend so will try to figure out what they really think. The more I think about it, the more I would like to give them credit as the hosts/my parents (since they are doing a lot), I just don’t want to make it awkward for them with presenting them as a couple or non-couple. & I haven’t actually ordered the invites yet so can still make changes if need be.
Post # 8
You could also do a short speech at the reception in which you thank your parents for being such gracious hosts that evening (and other things).
Post # 9
mah84: you don’t need to give credit but if you want to it would be, Mr. Jone Doe & Ms. Jane Doe or whatever it is. My parents are divorced and that is how we put them. That would probably be more comfortable because of the divorce but I would ask them this weekend like you said and see what they say 🙂